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UNITED STATES DEPARTMENT OF LABOR
F R A N C E S P E R K IN S , Secretary

C H I L D R E N ’S B U R E A U
G R A C E A B B O T T , Chief

GUIDING THE ADOLESCENT
BY

D. A. THOM, M.D.
+
Bureau Publication No. 225

U N IT E D

STATES

G O V E R N M E N T P R IN T IN G

O F F IC E

W A S H I N G T O N : 1933

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CONTENTS
Page
O O O îO S Ü lO lC O IsS M l-i-^

Letter of transmittal____________________________________________
Introduction_____________________________________________________
Purpose of the pamphlet________________________________ ___
Defining adolescence________________________________________
Adult attitude toward adolescence_________________________
Physical growth and development______________________________
General physical grow th____________________________________
Maturing of the reproductive system_____________________
Physical hygiene______________________ ______________ _______
Problems incidental to physical growth and development.
Attitudes toward s e x _____________
12
Sex instruction___________________________________________________________
12
Sex talk and reading_____________________________________________________
15
Masturbation___________________________________________________________
18
Adolescence and mental development_____________________________________________ 21
Measurement of intelligence_________ ;________;__________________ :_________
22
The slow m in d _____________________________________________________________
23
24
The average mind________________________________________________________
The superior mind___________________________________________________ ______
27
29
Special abilities and disabilities_________________________________ :________
The individual as a whole_______________________________________________ :
31
Some educational pitfalls_________________________________________ M._________
39
The question of w o rk _________________________________________________________
46
Learning to use leisure________________________________________________________
52
Present' com plaints__________________________
52
Education in the use o f leisure____________________________ ,___________
55
59
Adolescents at leisure____________________________________________________
A social conduct___________________________________________________________________
62
Stealing_________________________________________________________ ___________
65
Incorrigibility:_____________________________________ _____________
68
Evading rea lity ________________________________________________________________
72
Daydreaming and romancing_____ __________________________________________
72
Cheating______________________________________________ ;_____________________
73
Truancy____________________________________________________________________
75
D rinking_____________________________________________
76
The adolescent and his companions___________________________________________
78
The importance of friends_______________________________________________ .
78
“ Crushes ” ________________________________________________________________
81
Boy and girl relationships_________________________________________________
84
The needs of the parent_______________________ ____________v < _______________
87
Bibliography______________________________________________________________________
94
182415— 33

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LETTER OF TRANSMITTAL

n it e d

tates

epartm ent

h i l d r e n ’s

abor,

ureau

Washington, October 11, 1933.
M a d a m : There is transmitted herewith a bulletin for parents en
titled “ Guiding the Adolescent.” This bulletin was written for the
Children’s Bureau by Dr. D. A. Thom, director o f the habit clinics
o f Boston and director of the division o f mental hygiene in the
Department o f Mental Diseases o f Massachusetts.
Respectfully submitted.
G r a c e A b b o t t , Chief.
Hon. F r a n c e s P e r k i n s ,
Secretary o f Labor.

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V /

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GUIDING THE ADOLESCENT
INTRODUCTION
PURPOSE OF THE PAMPHLET

_ parent s interest in the welfare of his child begins long before
birth and lasts all his life, but his method of expressing this interest
necessarily undergoes many changes. Before the child’s birth it is
manifested in the mother’s care o f herself—in her attention to her
diet, her hours o f rest, her out-of-door exercise, and the various de
tails o f care o f her own body. After birth this care is transferred
to the infant—to nursing, bathing, and dressing him, and keeping
him dry and comfortable. As the baby grows older, some o f the in
terest in caring for his elementary physical needs is turned to getting
his cooperation in this care— in getting him, for instance, to use the
toilet chair and to feed himself. With the development of his mental
life, interest in his physical needs becomes secondary to interest in
his rapidly forming habits and attitudes—his ability to care for
himself and to get along with other people. And as the child grows
up, the parent’s interest is in the child’s achievements, his school
grades, his athletic and social activities, his vocation, his friendships,
his marriage, and in turn, his children.
This interest may be instinctive in the parent or may grow out of
his love and sense o f responsibility for the child, but accurate infor
mation as to the best methods o f rearihg the child under the condi
tions of present-day civilization will not come to the parent in this
way. The pamphlets on Prenatal Care, Infant Care, The Child
from One to Six, and Child Management were published by the
Children’s Bureau in the hope o f making such information more
easily available to parents. As the child begins to grow up, however,
the ideas o f “ cafe ” and “ management ” must be abandoned, for the*
growing child resents such parental control; he wants to care for and
manage himself, and this is not only desirable but essential if he is
to become a normal, independent adult. But because the child does
not learn to become completely independent all at once, the parent
will find it necessary to replace care and management with tactful
guidance.
The present pamphlet has been written in the hope o f helping
parents to understand the adolescent and how they can guide him
from childhood to healthy, happy adulthood.

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DEFINING ADOLESCENCE

Adolescence is the period o f growing up that comes between child
hood and adulthood. It may be thought o f either as the actual
growing-up process or as the time during which this process takes
place. In either case it is usually regarded as covering the years
from 12 to 20, or the “ teen ” age.
In the simple forms o f animal life this growing up is a purely
physiological process which takes place so naturally that there is no
distinct period o f adolescence. With increasing complexity o f life
and o f civilization, however, growing up, too, becomes more complex.
Thus it is necessary for the child of today to become not only physi
ologically mature but also intellectually, emotionally, and socially
mature; and, as these various forms o f growing up may not all
take place at the same time, adolescence stretches out over an in
creasingly longer period. A girl may reach puberty at the age of
12 or 13 and, being unaware o f any new sex emotions, may continue
to play with younger boys and girls, remaining emotionally and
socially a child until some experience awakens in her more adult
reactions; or a boy, growing up with adults and spending much
time in wide reading and adult conversation, may reach 16 with an
intellectual maturity far beyond that of the average adult, while
physically and emotionally he is still a child.
But other periods in the life o f the child are similarly complex
in present-day civilization. During early childhood boys and girls
must learn not only to care for the simple physical needs which they
share with young animals, but also to read and write, to be polite,
and to control their tempers and their impulse to cry over every
injury.
Not until the child begins to grow up is he, however, likely to be
troubled by, or even conscious of, the fact that there are many sides
to his nature; that these sides do not always keep pace with one
another; and that, although he is “ too big ” to do some things, he
is not old enough to do others. He may find that although he is
too grown up to play 44Indians ” or to be 44tucked in , he is not
yet considered old enough to go to late parties; or although he is
wearing long trousers he is not yet considered old enough to smoke.
Nor does the law help by setting any one age as the end o f childhood
and the beginning of adulthood. On the contrary, it fixes one age
as the minimum for driving an automobile, another for required
school attendance, another for entering industry, another for culpa
bility for unlawful conduct, another for marrying without parental
consent, another for making valid contracts, and another for voting;
and, although some o f these may coincide, they are more likely to
<rj

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INTRODUCTION

vary, not only from State to State but even within one State and
one community.
Thus the growing up which takes place very simply in young
animals and in primitive children, who are often initiated into
their adult responsibilities as soon as they have reached puberty, is
so gradual and complex in our children that it requires approxi
mately 8 years; and these 8 years have come to be regarded as a
special period with peculiar qualities and characteristics o f their
own, known as the period of adolescence.
ADULT ATTITUDE TOWARD ADOLESCENCE

Within the last few years the “ problems of adolescence ” have been
the subject o f so many investigations, books, articles, and speeches
that many people have come to think of adolescence as necessarily a
period o f problems. Every period o f life has its problems. But the
problems occurring in early childhood or in late adult life are likely
to bother only the members o f the immediate family who, in one way
or another, must adjust themselves to the undesirable personality
traits and behavior manifestations o f their offspring, their sisters and
brothers, or the husband or wife, as the case may be. The problems
occurring during adolescence, however, are likely to be noticed in the
boarding school, the high school, and the college or in recreational
groups, such as clubs and camps; and they may come to the attention
o f such an agency as the juvenile court. As these institutions and
agencies have looked to the fields of psychology and psychiatry for
help in dealing with their young people, the problems occurring dur
ing the period o f adolescence have doubtless been scrutinized more
extensively and more specifically than those occurring, for example,
during the twenties or the thirties.
No attempt will be made in this publication to discuss all the prob
lems which may occur during adolescence. As the aim o f the pam
phlet is to help the parent guide the normal adolescent and deal
with problems common to most growing boys and girls, unusual
problems and problems which cannot be dealt with save by a physi
cian or a psychiatrist have no place in the discussion.
There is grave danger that those whose professional activities
bring them rather exclusively in contact with the maladjusted will
eventually begin to interpret life in terms of the peculiarities, eccen
tricities, and personality deviations found in this rather restricted
and unrepresentative group. Members o f the professions o f educa
tion, psychology, psychiatry, and social work whose attention has
been centered rather exclusively on maladjusted or problem indivi
duals in the adolescent years have not been immune to this danger.

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GUIDING TH E ADOLESCENT

In their interest in working with this group, they have been inclined
to analyze the primary make-up of these poorly adjusted adolescents,
selecting every problem and every deviation from the so-called “ nor
mal ” , and to combine these findings into a description which they
then regard as characteristic o f all adolescents but which actually rep
resents nothing at all, being characteristic neither of adolescents as a
group nor o f any particular adolescent who may be maladjusted. This
is one of the dangers o f too high specialization, too broad general
ization, and, last and most important, too little association with the
great masses of people who make up human society.
It is not to be denied that between the years o f 12 and 20 there
are very definite problems o f a physical, mental, and social nature
which youth must necessarily meet in its adjustment to present needs
and preparation for life’s future demands. These problems are suf
ficiently well recognized, and the most common causes for failure in
meeting them sufficiently well understood, to justify discussion. Yet
to assume that every adolescent boy or girl is drifting about in an
emotional whirlpool or may be dashed on the shores o f failure be
cause o f some hidden conflict, is nothing more than an indulgence in
phantasy.
There are a sufficient number o f problem people and problem sit
uations to demand the attention and occupy the time o f all those who
are now trained or may be adequately trained in the next decade
without creating problems where they do not exist.

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PHYSICAL GROWTH AND DEVELOPMENT
Not infrequently a parent is heard to say, “ Now that my child is 15 years
old I should like to make some study o f adolescence.” The fact is that only a
minimum of advantage is to be gained by such study when the offspring has
already reached adolescence. The maximum gain is to be achieved when
adolescence is foreseen in the rearing of the infant and the child. (Hollingworth, Leta S .: The Psychology of the Adolescent, p. viii. D . Appleton & Co.,
New York, 1928.)

GENERAL PHYSICAL GROWTH1

A sudden and perhaps surprising increase in height and weight,
and in the size o f arms, legs, hands, feet, and any other part of the
anatomy is typical during adolescence. Within 1 year the child may
gain 25 or 30 pounds in weight and 4 or 5 inches in height. This
period o f rapid growth usually occurs early in the “ teens ” and some
what earlier in girls than in boys.
This sudden increase, however, rarely changes the nature of the
child’s physique. In other words, both the short child and the tall
child grow noticeably during adolescence, the short child growing
into a short adult, and the tall child into a tall adult. There are,
o f course, exceptions; a child who has had long and serious illness
interfering with normal growth before adolescence may, on recovery,
suddenly make up for this during adolescence; and a child suffering
from a glandular disturbance may have an abnormal rate of growth.
For the average child, however, nothing but continuous growth
should be expected.
Girls grow more slowly after 14 years and usually stop growing
entirely by the time they are 20. Boys may continue to grow until
they are 22 or even 23 years o f age, but their rate of growth is slower
after the fifteenth or the sixteenth year.
Strength also increases rapidly from the seventh year on, and more
rapidly during the early teens. The fact that the adolescent’s
strength increases more rapidly than his height accounts for some
of his awkwardness and clumsiness in managing himself; he has to
learn by experience just how much effort he needs to put behind his
strong muscles.
1 The author is indebted to D. Appleton & Co. for permission to use in this pamphlet
some of the material which has previously appeared in his book, Normal Youth and Its
Everyday Problems, published in 1932.

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MATURING OF THE REPRODUCTIVE SYSTEM

The most outstanding physiological development during adoles
cence is the maturing o f the reproductive organs. When these organs
become capable of functioning as in the adult— when the ovaries in
the girl begin to release the egg cells, or ova, essential to child-bear
ing, and the testicles in the boy begin to release the sperm cells
essential to fertilization—puberty has been reached.
It is not easy to know just when the reproductive organs begin to
function. In the girl ovulation, or the formation and discharge of
egg cells, is closely-connected with menstruation, and so the girl is
said to be “ mature ” when she has had her first menstrual flow, or
“ monthly period.” Although there is no similar process in the boy,
the discharge o f semen during sleep, known as a “ nocturnal emis
sion ” , is often considered evidence that he has reached maturity.
The age at which these signs of maturity occur varies considerably.
In this country puberty is likely to occur between the ages o f 12 and
15 years in girls and a year or two later in boys. But race, climate,
living conditions, and the child’s own physical condition all play
a part in the maturing process and make even further variations in
age possible.
Accompanying and preceding puberty itself, noticeable physical
changes take place in the child. There is a growth o f hair in the
armpits and pubic regions, and further development o f the genitals;
the voice becomes fuller and, in the boy, is likely to “ break ” as it
changes from a childish to a more masculine pitch. As the girl’s
breasts develop and her hips broaden, her body begins to appear
womanly, while the boy, with his broadening shoulders and the
growth o f hair on his face, begins to take on a more manly aspect.
PHYSICAL HYGIENE

With all these changes taking place in the child’s body, some
thought must be given to his physical hygiene. Rapid growth is
likely to cause either a tremendous increase in the child’s appetite,
or, particularly in the girl, a tendency to finickyness with loss o f
appetite at some times and strong, special cravings—as, for example,
for particularly sweet or sour dishes—at other times. Attention
must therefore be given not only to the child’s diet but also to his
eating habits. Sudden increase in the rate of growth is likely to
cause fatigue, making long hours o f sleep essential. Rapid growth
o f the larger muscles, gain in strength, and the possible awakening of
a disturbing sex-consciousness make out-of-door exercise highly de
sirable. As all the increased body activities are likely to increase the

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body wastes, good habits of elimination, including freedom from
constipation without the use o f drugs, and a healthy, active skin con
dition are o f primary importance.
In other words, the rules for the adolescent are much the same as
those for the younger child. Parents scarcely need to be reminded
that an abundance o f milk, wholesome bread and cereals, and fresh
fruits and vegetables are essential; that rich pastries and heavy
sweets are undesirable; and that tea and coffee are unsuitable. They
know from experience that regular meals and a minimum o f eating
between meals keep the small child’s digestive system in good order;
and that plenty of out-of-door play, regular toilet habits, and a
clean body are essential to keeping him comfortable, healthy, and
cheerful. By the time adolescence is reached, they should be able
to depend on their boys and girls to follow a hygienic routine with
little assistance. Certain modifications may have to be introduced;
e.g., increase in the amounts o f food, gradual decrease in the hours
o f sleep, changes in the type of out-of-door activity, and perhaps
greater conscientiousness about internal and external body cleanli
ness. But there are no special rules for the hygiene o f the adoles
cent; puberty is, after all, but the continuation o f a development
which began before birth and for which the normal human being
is as well equipped as he is for any other natural physical change.
The parent who has helped his child establish good habits of eating,
sleeping, elimination, cleanliness, posture, and exercise in early child
hood needs only to impress upon the adolescent the importance of
continuing to observe the fundamental principles of physical hygiene
in order to maintain a healthy and efficient body during this or any
other period of his life.
With regard to the hygiene of the menstruating girl, there seems
to be a great difference of opinion. The old attitude that the men
struating girl was u sick ” or “ unwell ” , that she could not bathe,
that she must never get wet feet, that she must not eat certain foods,
and that all her activities should be modified even to the extent o f
spending some time in bed, is scorned by the modern girl who goes
to coeducational schools and lets nothing interfere with the interests
and activities she shares with boys; and it is necessarily scorned by
the girl who enters industry or business and is obliged to ignore
all minor ills and discomforts. But neither of these attitudes can
be whole-heartedly recommended nor whole-heartedly condemned.
Physical build, the position and stage o f development o f the repro
ductive organs, the functioning o f the glands of internal secretion,
and the general physical condition o f individual girls vary so greatly
that although one girl may safely indulge in sea bathing during her

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menstrual period, another may be actually obliged to spend some
time in bed. Although the effects o f menstruation on physical and
mental activities have been studied by numerous investigators, these
studies have usually been made on women and girls in whom the
function was already well established ; their findings would not neces
sarily apply, therefore, to the maturing girl who is not yet fully
grown and whose periods may still be somewhat irregular.
For these reasons parents can be advised only in a general way, that
they themselves regard menstruation as a normal process, neither
looking upon the girl as “ sick” nor letting her regard herself so.
They may encourage her to continue her usual activities in the usual
manner, warning, however, against overexertion and undue exposure.
I f she seems to be experiencing unusual discomfort or pain, they
should refer her to a physician both for advice as to hygiene in the
particular case and for correction of the cause o f the difficulty if
possible.
PROBLEMS INCIDENTAL TO PHYSICAL GROWTH AND
DEVELOPMENT

Much o f the behavior which parents consider unusual, disturbing,
irritating, or alarming is actually but a normal reaction to the proc
esses o f physical development and the general business o f growing
up. One o f the most trying difficulties for both parents and child
may be the simple self-consciousness that comes to the child who
grows so rapidly that he does not quite know what to do with all of
himself. This is a perfectly normal phase o f adolescence, and yet it
may present rather a problem to a child who is diffident and sensitive
and realizes that his awkwardness annoys his parents and amuses his
friends. So, too, the self-consciousness and unhappiness resulting
from the poor complexion with which many adolescents are afflicted
may lead to such lack o f self-confidence that the boy or girl prefers
solitude to participation in activities with others, and may wander
about friendless and forlorn.
Because such experiences matter intensely to the adolescent— and
often trouble his parents—they merit further attention.
Arnold was a long, lanky, 15-year old whose arms and legs had apparently
kept a long way ahead o f the rest o f his body in the course of his growing up.
H is hands seemed fairly to dangle away in space, and he managed all his body
with loose and lurching movements.
In spite of the fact that he was a bright lad, he did very poor school work
and was considered the “ laziest boy in school.” H e seemed absolutely out of
harmony with his work, with his classmates, and with the world.
This boy was so self-conscious and so unhappy over looking and feeling
queer that he was unable to get along with anyone. Being depressed he made
bitterly sarcastic and cynical remarks on every occasion, and this behavior
made him still less popular. H e was referred to as “ that great big dumb-

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looking guy ” by Jiis classmates, and it was hard to tell whether their attitude
was responsible for his sullen unhappiness or whether his sullen unhappiness
led to conduct that made such an attitude inevitable.

Clumsiness, awkwardness, inability to manage rapidly growing
feet, and self-consciousness over hands that seem suddenly to thrust
themselves out o f their sleeves are probably more characteristic of
the adolescent boy than o f the adolescent girl.
Growth is at times so rapid that it takes the child a little time to
get accustomed to his increased size. A further complication arises
through the fact that parts of his body may grow more rapidly than
others, so that it is difficult for him to coordinate his movements.
Moreover, increase in strength not only is rapid but is relatively
even greater than increase in size, and until the adolescent learns to
control his new strength he is likely to be awkward and lumbering.
The following description of Martha illustrates another type of
unhappy attitude which may arise in the course of self-consciousness
over physical development:
Martha was born in “ the old country ” in a community in which boys and
girls mature very early. When she came to the United States she soon learned
English and attended grammar school with American-born children. She was
rather bright and very studious and held her own fairly well with her class
mates, but she was noticeably taller and more fully developed than any of the
other girls and she felt self-conscious and ashamed of this. Whenever she
was called upon to recite she would stand with a slump, her knees flexed, her
shoulders drooping, and her whole body sagging.
She did this so contin
uously whenever she was with these smaller children, that she developed not
only a poor standing but also poor walking posture, which, quite aside from
a possible danger to her health, made her look most unattractive.

The importance of good posture habits in maintaining the various
organs of the body in their proper position and in enabling them to
work to the best advantage has been so much stressed by physicians
in recent years that posture charts, posture exercises, and posture
clinics have been made available for great numbers o f children. Pos
ture training, however, is something which should be begun in early
childhood and under the supervision o f someone familiar with the
anatomy and “ mechanics ” of the human body, and therefore no
attempt will be made to outline its principles here. The subject is
called to the attention of parents, in this connection, for two reasons
only: (1) That rapidly growing children may have difficulty in
learning how to carry themselves or may feel tired and inclined to
slump, so that special attention to posture is advisable at this time;
and (2) that many adolescents, particularly girls, assume unhealthy
posture because of self-consciousness over their sudden growth. The
former may need more rest, other forms of exercise, and possibly the
advice of the physician and the use of braces, but the latter need
chiefly a change of mental attitude,

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Round-shoulderedness is not an easy habit to overcome. Although
it is difficult to convince the 12- or 13-year-old girl that she will come
to be proud o f her height and her good figure as she grows older, it is
far easier to prevent poor posture habits than to correct them once
they are formed.
Parents can accomplish a great deal in this direction merely by
helping the girl choose clothes suitable to her type, and, so far as
possible, sufficiently attractive to make her confident that she looks
well. They can also help greatly by softening some o f the inevitable
jibes o f thoughtless brothers and sisters (or, indeed, by encouraging
these members o f the family to be more considerate) and most o f all,
by helping the girl to see her good points and gain enough self-con
fidence not only to take brotherly criticism good-naturedly but to
make the best of her figure as it is.
Self-consciousness over an unhealthy and unsightly complexion is
even more likely to give parents cause for anxiety. Skin eruptions
are fairly common during early adolescence. The small ducts
through which oil is carried to the skin apparently do not grow fast
enough to take care o f the increased activity of the glands supplying
this secretion, and, as a result, they become stopped up and a comedo,
or “ blackhead ” , forms at the opening of the duct. As the glands
continue to function even though drainage is blocked, the ducts
become overfilled and little raised places, or u pimples ” , begin to
appear on the surface of the skin.
It is unfortunate that just at the time when the growing child’s
skin is perhaps in need o f a little added care he is most tempted
by chocolates, candy bars, cookies, ice-cream sundaes, and soda-foun
tain drinks, and possibly most careless about keeping his digestive
system in healthy order. Skin specialists have found that proper
attention to the fundamental principles of physical hygiene already
referred to, wholesome diet, free elimination, plenty of sunshine and
out-of-door exercise, and thorough daily or twice-daily washing with
warm water and soap (which is not nearly so harmful to the com
plexion as many adolescents believe) will keep most young com
plexions in good condition. When the skin fails to respond well to
this routine, more vigorous measures under the direction of a physi
cian are advisable. It is well known, however, that proper attention
to the skin in the early stages o f these afflictions can prevent develop
ment o f the unsightly later stages for which medical treatment may
be necessary.
But in spite of our best efforts we cannot eliminate all the sources
o f unhappy self-consciousness during adolescence, and therefore we
might well spend some o f our effort in helping young people acquire
a philosophy of life which will make their burdens bearable. The
need for this is well illustrated in Mattie’s case.

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M attie was in the seventh grade when her life began to be miserable because
of her complexion. She had always been rather thin and pale. Although she
would have been described as plain, she was not unattractive until her face
began to be disfigured by numerous unsightly blemishes. She washed harder
than ever, tried to be discreet in her diet, and, on her mother’s suggestion,
began taking various cathartics, but still her face continued to be covered with
blackheads and pimples.
Daily scrutiny before a mirror had made Mattie so unhappy about her
appearance that she became extremely sensitive to any fancied slights from
her schoolmates. She suspected that some o f them avoided her because they
found her face repulsive. A ll this unhappiness was, however, greatly increased
when some one called her “ M iss Pimples.”
Mattie now began to suspect that some o f the other children were calling
her “ Miss Pimples,” and she went about in a self-conscious, unhappy way.
Then a schoolmate with whom she had been friendly gave a party and failed
to invite her and even let it be known that Mattie had been left out because
of her pimples.

This example, perhaps, shows the schoolmate as unfeeling. But
the fact remains that the world has its share o f such unfeeling indi
viduals, who derive some compensatory satisfaction from calling
attention to the defects and weaknesses o f others. There are
always some who find their joy in imitating the limp o f a lame
person or the speech impediment of a stammerer, who take pleasure
in calling attention to the shy and retiring individual, and think
it amusing to point out directly or indirectly the physical, mental,
or social imperfections and inferiorities which they themselves do
not have. To meet these attacks requires courage and a greater in
difference to pain than most adolescents possess. For it is through
the experience of pain that individuals develop a philosophy o f
life which permits them t o endure suffering, and in early adolescence
most boys and girls have not yet had sufficient experience to endure
pain easily.
Pointing out the burdens o f other people does little to make the
adolescent’s burdens more bearable. Discoursing on the injustices
o f life adds little sweetness to the adolescent’s own suffering. Per
haps the most that can be done to help him is to encourage him to
see his strong points and build his philosophy o f life around these
rather than around his weaknesses ; and then to help him gain a
little perspective, so that even though the tribulations o f today loom
largest, he will not completely lose sight o f the fact that tomorrow
and the next day and the next still hold promise o f brightness.
182415°— 33------- 2

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I f we are wise enough and grown-up enough ourselves, we can give the
adolescent an interpretation o f sex and human behavior that will enable him to
face frankly his own cravings and inferiorities, real or imagined, and to adjust
to them in a positive, constructive spirit. (T aft, Jessie: Mental-Hygiene Prob
lems of Normal Adolescence. Mental Hygiene, vol. 5, no. 4 (October 1921),
pp. 741-751.)

Notwithstanding the fact that sex is a subject which causes par
ents a great deal of concern, not only during the adolescent period
but also during the earlier years, there is always danger of over
stressing these problems by featuring the subject and danger of
creating a panic where nothing more than intelligent interest, keen
observation, and ordinary wisdom is needed. For this reason much
that has to be said about this subject is being presented as it natur
ally comes up in the discussions of physical growth and develop
ment, personal relationships, and work and leisure-time activities.
This section, therefore, is intended only as general background from
which may be obtained a common point of view on the subject.
It is now generally recognized that the methods in vogue a quarter
o f a century back which attempted to prevent undesirable sex con
duct by keeping young people in ignorance and subjecting them
to rigid disciplinary measures, were neither wise nor effective and
that the results o f such methods were more harmful than the indis
cretions which they were intended to prevent. In other words,
more real harm may come from the worry, anxiety, fear, and feel
ings o f guilt and inferiority caused by unwise efforts on the part
o f the parent to prevent or stop an undesirable sex practice than
from the practice itself. This does not mean that the subject should
be ignored and that indulgences of this kind should be permitted
to go on without parental interference. It does indicate, however,
that sex instruction should be frank, honest, and in keeping with
the facts. No attempt should be made to bolster up good, sound
advice with statements of dangers which, in the first place, may
not exist and, in the second place, serve no other purpose than
the creation of unreasonable fears that actually harm the individual
at the time and may well become handicaps to him later in life.

Just as training in the habits o f physical hygiene for adolescence
should be a continuation of the training o f early childhood, so in12

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ATTITUDES TOWARD SEX

struction in the nature and function of the reproductive organs and
the part that sex plays in the life o f the growing human being should
be a continuation of earlier sex instruction. In other words, the
parent should not think o f adolescence as the time for a campaign in
physical hygiene and sex instruction. For just as habits o f physical
hygiene, either good or bad, are formed long before adolescence, so
sex information, either good or bad, is picked up by most children
before puberty. The parent who thinks that the child who does not
discuss these things is ignorant o f them should be warned that the
child’s very silence may indicate a greater knowledge than he cares
to share with his parent.
In Child Management (United States Children’s Bureau Publica
tion No. 143) parents were advised to give “ clear, frank answers
suited to the child’s intelligence and development ” on all questions
o f sex. When this practice is followed, it may'well happen that by
the time a child reaches adolescence, particularly if he is brought up
intimately with older children, he has asked for all the information
he needs. But the parents should by no means feel obliged to wait for
the child’s questions when they see that rapid development is taking
place. They can easily notice the body changes already described
and remind or point out to the child that these are signs that he is
passing from childhood to adulthood.
The father can, perhaps, discuss these matters most helpfully with
the boy. He should prepare him to expect an occasional discharge
o f semen, likely to occur during sleep, explaining that this is nature’s
way o f taking care o f his sex activity until he should be physically,
economically, and socially ready to assume the responsibility of
mating, and assuring him that these “ nocturnal emissions” , as
well as the involuntary “ erections ” he may experience either in sleep
or in sexually exciting situations, are perfectly natural occurrences
about which he should feel no alarm. He should also advise the
boy that he is less likely to be disturbed by these experiences i f he
leads a vigorous life, finding pleasure and perhaps a certain pride
in hard work and play, cool and regular sleep, cold baths, and whole
some interests.
The mother’s instruction should prepare the girl for the occur
rence o f menstruation, explaining its purpose in relation to child
bearing and advising her how to care for herself during her monthly
periods. The girl should also be given some understanding o f her
sex reactions. She should be reassured, for instance, regarding the
vaginal discharge she may experience in situations that are in some
way sexually stimulating to her. She should also have an under
standing o f the sex tension and urge which, although less obvious
and less clearly recognized than in the boy, may, nevertheless, be dis-

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turbing. She has a right to know that her days o f excessive irrita
bility or restlessness or emotional instability are due, not to the
minor annoyances o f everyday life which would ordinarily not upset
her, nor to any inherent disagreeableness or crossness, but to the
physiological tension which is a part o f every mature and normal
woman’s sex life. Once they are recognized, she can learn to relieve
her feelings o f pent-up emotion and energy by entering into suitable
activities. Instead of battling blindly with something she does not
understand, she will be able to seek deliberately for a satisfactory
means of expression. Her outlet may be in tennis, or swimming, or
cleaning the porches, or mowing the lawn; she may crave doing
something physically strenuous and should be helped to find it; or
she may have need for a purely emotional outlet and may find it
best in music, in dramatics, or in writing. When she finds a satis
factory outlet, she should be allowed to make the most o f it, regard
less of how skillful she may be. It is more important that she find
an enjoyable and helpful means o f expression than that she become
a good performer. As time goes on, she will find new outlets; sim
ple, happy companionship with a group o f young people, engrossing
work, intensive study, and service for others will all help her to
satisfy her growing emotional and physical tension until she is
ready to enter into a mature sex relationship and assume the respon
sibilities o f wifehood and motherhood.
Both the boy and the girl should be told not only about the organs
and processes o f reproduction in their own sex, but also about those
o f the other sex. Above all, they should be made to feel free to ask
any questions or consult their parents about any feelings or experi
ences which they find puzzling or disturbing.
Parents who feel that they do not know enough about these mat
ters to explain them to their children may find it well to discuss
them first with each other and with their family physician. They
may also get help from various books describing the physiology of
reproduction and suggesting ways in which parents can explain it
to their children. I f for some reason they still feel unable to tackle
the subject, they should arrange to have the family physician confer
with the child or recommend something to be read by the child him
self. Although by this method they will probably lose the rather
precious experiences that come to the parent who is on an intimate,
confidential level with his child, they will at least not fail the child
as they would by neglecting this matter entirely.
Some parents are inclined to feel that the importance of sex in
struction— and, indeed, of all aspects o f child care and guidance——
is greatly exaggerated. They believe that they, and many of their
friends, grew up to be competent men and women without any so-

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called habit training or careful sex instruction. But even if they
can recall no anxieties, doubts, shocks, or unhappy experiences which
they might have been spared with wise guidance, they will surely be
able to see that the very changes which they and their generation
have made in the world are creating the need for changed methods
o f bringing up the next generation.
As civilization speeds up, there is an increase not only in life’s
conveniences, comforts, and pleasures, but also in its dangers. Auto
mobiles, for example, contribute greatly to man’s convenience, com
fort, and pleasure, but they also greatly increase the accidents caus
ing disability and death; motion pictures add to our sources of
amusement, but they may also give the growing child premature
and undesirable ideas concerning the relations between men and
women. This does not mean that all automobiles and all motion
pictures should be condemned. It does mean, however, that parents
who are fond o f their children will teach them to cross the streets
carefully as soon as they begin to go out alone; and, in the same
spirit, as soon as the children are likely to come in contact with sex
attitudes, through motion pictures, books, companions, or other
forms o f observation and experience, the parents will want to help
them get a sane and healthy outlook on this part o f life.
SEX TALK AND READING

Parents, as well as teachers and recreation leaders, are frequently
alarmed at the sexual precociousness displayed in the conversations
o f some o f their worldly wise children, or concerned, and possibly
offended, by what they consider “ smutty ” or “ dirty ” talk. Their
concern and alarm increase when they discover that these conversa
tions are traveling far and wide among the younger population and
that indignant parents are complaining of having their children
contaminated.
The child s motive in indulging in such conversation may be
merely a response to a lively healthy curiosity and a desire for in
formation. I f he is already well supplied with information and
has not been made to feel that it is particularly private or personal,
he may have a generous inclination to pass it along or to show off’
his superior knowledge to those o f his companions who are less
well informed. When the conversation tends to be a recital o f
romantic adventures or shameless exploits, the motive is likely to
be a desire for attention and prestige. The child is endeavoring
to impress his young audience with his own supposed experience
in mature sex activities. Such, at least, are the most common motives
for sex conversation in the child from 6 to 10 years of age.

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The crudeness o f language means nothing to the child. The socalled vulgar and obscene expressions serve exactly the same purpose
to him as the more refined and scientific vocabulary would serve in
a discussion at a medical conference. So the terms and the ideas
which they convey need not cause any particular alarm. The con
cern should rather be over the fact that these youngsters ofttimes
have not so much information as misinformation to hand out and
discuss, so that after it is all over they are left pondering over the
subject with their natural, normal, healthy curiosity unsatisfied.
This leads to daydreams and fantasies which in themselves are
likely to be sexually more stimulating than the talk. For this reason
it is o f the utmost importance that the child be able to regard his
parent as a source o f information always available, where curiosity
can be adequately satisfied whenever aroused.
Even after the boy and girl reach puberty, and long after they
have acquired an intellectual understanding o f sex and its relation
to much o f their social activity, they may still utilize sex talk, ob
scene words, smutty stories, and recitals of personal experiences
(often without a foundation in fact) as a means of “ putting them
selves across.” In addition, however, they begin to derive from
their conversations a vicarious sex thrill— first through the visual
and verbal stimulation o f an imagined experience and secondly
through the excitement of participating in a conversation that
would be frowned upon, if not actually forbidden, by their elders.
That this may develop into a recognizable problem and therefore
merits intelligent handling may be seen from the following example:
A lvin was on the verge of being expelled from high school, for although he
was a good student, a fair athlete, and a natural leader he was constantly
being reported to the principal because of his smutty conversation. H is stories
were always floating around the corridors, the wash rooms, the locker rooms,
the showers, and, in fact, any corner where he might draw a private audience.
In spite o f several warnings he continued with his obscene chatter until the
principal began to conclude that this boy was really “ foul-minded ” and was a
bad influence in the school.
In spite of the sophisticated stories this boy was telling it became clear
in one frank conversation with him that he was amazingly ignorant of the
elementary facts of sex. Since earliest childhood he had had great curiosity
regarding anatomical differences between boys and girls, the process of birth,
the behavior o f animals, and the sensations of his own body. When he had
approached his parents with questions he had been told that this was a sub
ject not to be discussed by children. H is father had been particularly remote,
making him feel that he was much too young and too unimportant to have
any thoughts worthy of serious consideration. Alvin accepted this attitude
and made no further inroads on his father’s time and attention, but he did not
give up his search for information.
It soon became one o f his favorite pastimes to hunt for the answers to his
questions. But the garbled ideas of his companions and the vague discussions
in books merely served to excite his curiosity further. A t the same time he

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began to discover that such information as he had picked up and pieced together
proved interesting to others; sometimes he would be able to shock them and
sometimes to amuse th em ; sometimes he would embarrass and sometimes enter
tain his audience, all depending on their own degree of sophistication. But
always he would provoke their interest and attention. So he continued to
use this method of making himself interesting and added new spiciness to his
tales lest he lose prestige.
This became such a habit with Alvin that he failed to realize as he grew
older that some of his companions would have liked him just as well, or even
better, if he had dropped some of his obscenities. They were as much dis
gusted by his vulgar habits of conversation as they would have been by
vulgar eating or toilet habits in a 16-year-old boy. They were ashamed to
have him visit at their homes and unwilling to invite him to any o f their
parties.
Alvin was himself rather disgusted and ashamed when he finally began to
realize how his conversation must have sounded to boys who had received
better instruction than he and had a better understanding of his stories
than he had. H e was interested in the discovery, too, that his conversation
was but a bid for attention and popularity, which he might seek to better
advantage by his skill, for example, in some of his favorite sports.

The method of handling these problems depends on the type of
individual concerned. It is useless in any case to appear shocked
and horrified, or to resort to tears or anger. It is far better to let the
immature youngster know that we understand just what this activity
means to him and why he is seeking to gain recognition in this
particular way. The fact that people in general consider this line
o f conversation vulgar and offensive, just as they would bad man
ners, may be pointed out to him, and at the same time other ways
of getting recognition may be suggested. W ith the younger group
a frank talk on the subject of sex, making it interesting and unemo
tional, does more good than anything else. It gives them a new
and more responsible attitude toward keeping the whole subject of
sex clean.
The older adolescents will recognize that young people who spe
cialize in sex talk usually have no other way of making themselves
interesting. Such individuals would rather be criticized and cen
sured than ignored. As a 9-year old once said o f another boy o f
his own age who was always talking smut, “ He is the dirtiest and
the weakest boy in school. I can lick him with one hand.”
Most children do pass through this phase o f using more or less
obscene language, just as they pass through phases of making gri
maces or tiresome noises. It requires considerable patience to live
through all these various phases with equanimity, but even the
period of obscenity should not call forth parental excitement. An
unemotional attitude and a certain amount of understanding o f what
the child is driving at are more helpful than either wrath or sorrow.
Much o f the discussion concerning sex talk applies also to the
reading o f erotic literature. The danger in this type of lurid litera
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ture lies in the fact that much of it portrays situations which are
overdrawn and not actually representative of reality as these boys
and girls will experience it. There is always a sufficient amount of
literature available which serves the purpose of diverting sex inter- •
ests into other channels without stimulating sex phantasies and
creating further problems, and both the schools and the public
libraries should offer every assistance to parents and to the adoles
cents themselves in finding books that are worth while.
MASTURBATION

The practice o f handling or otherwise stimulating the genitals is
not limited to adolescents. Most young children make the discovery
either in the course of exploring their bodies, playing some game, or
under the influence o f other children or unscrupulous adults, that
certain parts o f their bodies respond more pleasurably than others to
touch, and for a brief time at least, during this early period o f “ sex
ual awareness ” they may innocently experiment with these new
sensations. It is important to discourage this practice in general by
keeping the genitals clean and the clothing comfortable, by carefully
supervising the child’s visits to the toilet, by being familiar with all
his associated and well informed as to his activities in various places
and at various times of the day, and on specific occasions by diverting
him from the practice to some other activity or interest without let
ting him feel self-conscious or ashamed. (See Child Management,
p. 31.)
The practice of masturbation is encountered so frequently, however,
in normal, healthy boys and girls from the preschool age through ado
lescence that there is no logical reason why everything possible should
not be done to allay parental concern about the habit. The real harm
results from the treatment o f the habit which is likely to be instituted
when parents become emotionally upset. The parent is likely to
think only in terms o f the possible dire physical effects the habit
may have upon the human organism, quite unmindful that the real
danger lies in making the child feel self-conscious and inferior, and
in leading him to turn all his thoughts upon his supposed wicked
ness and abnormality. This tendency to introspective self-examina
tion and self-condemnation in turn affects his attitude toward the
world at large; he avoids mingling with others, feeling unworthy o f
their society and perhaps fearing lest they suspect and discover his
weakness. His normal, healthy outlook on life becomes distorted.
There is probably no surer way o f perpetuating such a habit
than that o f making the individual feel that he is sinful, different,
queer, and wicked, or will become physically degenerate, an object
to be avoided, and a candidate for a mental hospital through his
indiscretions. What he needs is relief from anxiety, not more

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anxiety; a feeling of strength and superiority, not o f weakness and
inferiority; truth, not lies. The adolescent already feels that he is a
victim o f an undesirable habit. He knows that any habit which
makes him think less well o f himself is something to be fought and
mastered. He is already carrying a heavy burden. A. panicky
parent should not add to it by injecting fears which have no basis in
fact merely because this seems to be the easiest way to meet the
situation.
Undesirable sex behavior need not be either ignored or condemned.
When it comes to the parents’ attention as a problem of one o f their
own children, they should seize the opportunity for a frank discus
sion o f the whole subject o f sex and the varied healthy activities
that may be utilized as substitutes for this immature sex behavior.
I f the parents cannot approach the subject in this intellectual and
unemotional way, they should delegate the task to the family phy
sician, a wise teacher, a friend, or some other suitable person who
would help rather than hinder the adolescent in his attempt to get a
mature outlook on sex conduct. This is not the time for evasion,
prudery, or deceit; it is the time for frank, honest approach to one of
the most common problems adolescents have to face.
The insidious way in which poor handling of this problem may
give rise to conflicts interfering with the individual’s physical and
mental well-being may be seen in the following story o f a 15-year
old boy:
D ennis had a problem of sleeplessness which worried his parents so much
that they finally consulted a physician. For 2 years he had been wakeful
at night, though, so fa r as his parents knew, there was nothing the matter
with him. They had always regarded his sleeplessness as a bad habit acquired
through his interest in reading in bed; but as the boy grew older and the
habit continued and as it became obvious that he was in need of more sleep,
they felt increasingly anxious about him.
Dennis’ father was a busy clergyman. He had given his son very little
sex instruction, and his attitude toward the subject had not encouraged the
boy to discuss his thoughts and experiences with him. H e told his son “ the
dangers of self-abuse ” and gave most of his sex instruction in terms o f what
not to do.
Unfortunately Dennis had already been initiated into the practice o f mas
turbation by one of his companions before his father had got around to telling
him how “ e v il” and “ dangerous” this indulgence is. Immediately following
his father’s talk' with him, the boy became very anxious.
H e entertained the idea that he had committed some unpardonable sin, that
he had ruined his health, and that everybody could tell that he was in the grip
of this habit. He plunged himself into a variety of activities which allowed
him to forget his problem during the day, but at night he would be haunted
by fears of the terrible results which he would eventually suffer from his
indulgences. His fears, however, did not help him to overcome the habit; in
fact, the habit was the only way he could give momentary relief to his anxious
mind and put an end to his struggle with sleeplessness.

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ADOLESCENT

A perfectly frank discussion of the whole subject of sex and its function was
a revelation to the boy. It gave him a new lease on life and permitted him
to think of himself and compare himself with others without need for torturing
self-condemnation. This well-meaning father might well have sown the seeds
for a real catastrophe in the life of this boy had not some relief been adminis
tered by presenting to him a true picture of the normal stages o f development.

It is not always necessary for parents to pry into the sex activity
o f their children and get confessions o f these secret indulgences.
The whole sex problem can be discussed quite as frankly in an
impersonal way and often more helpfully than the individual prob
lem. It is wise for parents to let children appreciate that these
situations are not particularly uncommon, that most boys have to
meet them, and that there is little cau,se for undue alarm. A t the
same time they do well to stress the fact that solitary preoccupation
with one’s own body fo r the purpose o f obtaining pleasurable sensa
tions is an immature form o f behavior, that immature sex habits tend
to interfere with one’s normal adjustment to other people, and that
any habit which tends to lessen one’s self-esteem should be discarded.
Then ways and means o f meeting the situation can be outlined, and
there will be a much better chance o f the plan’s being carried through
by the boy whose self-esteem has been restored than by the boy
who is in the grip of fear.
Having looked into some o f the aspects of sex behavior that are
likely to trouble parents, let us now look back for a moment at the
subject of sex in general. Sex is not a problem; it is one o f the many
aspects o f normal life. Like the physical, emotional, and intellectual
aspects o f life, it passes through various normal stages of develop
ment. In the course o f this development there may be physical
awkwardness, emotional turmoil, intellectual doubts and misgivings,
and times o f unusual sex awareness, all o f which serve to let the
organism know that growth is taking place. The normal adolescent
learns to adjust his life to all these changes. There is no need to
make him feel that adolescence is a kind o f battleground or that he
will be forever fighting his cravings for sex experiences.
In the end the sex behavior of the adolescent boy and girl is
determined to a large extent by their whole adjustment to life. I f
their relationships with their parents and their friends are satis
factory and happy, and they have adequate outlets for their various
energies and interests, they are likely to meet their maturing sex
drives adequately. It is the emotionally starved boy or girl or the
adolescent without adequate interests who is most likely to plunge
into experimentation with sex for the satisfaction which he has
failed to find in ways more in keeping with his stage of development.

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Individuals are frequently so topheavy with brightness and academic conceit
that t h e / are worth less in the economic market than a well-trained adult with
the mentality of a 10-year-old child.
(Richards, Esther Loring, M .D .: Be
haviour Aspects of Child Conduct, p. 16. Macmillan Co., New York, 1932.)

Mental development is not nearly so easy to observe as physical
development. Any mother can see that her young daughter is out
growing her sweaters and skirts and dresses and that her young son is
getting too tall for short trousers; and the boy and girl can add to
this evidence o f growth by pointing to last year’s notch on the
measuring tree or figuring out the gain in actual inches and pounds.
But when it comes to mental development, units and standards of
measurement are lacking. The parent may realize that the son or
daughter has a more grown-up outlook on life; and the son and
daughter may realize that they are able to do more advanced school
work, but they would all find it more difficult to measure this growth
in terms o f mental inches or pounds.
Mind is thought o f in terms o f processes and activities, and it is
naturally less easy to measure these than to measure body stature.
Moreover, the various mental processes and activities develop at
different times and different rates. It has been found that while
many o f them increase during adolescence, some remain about the
same and some actually decrease. Nor can it be said that mental
development ceases with adolescence. Indeed a well-known univer
sity extension department recently stated in one o f its advertise
ments that adults over 25 learn more rapidly than adolescents
between the ages o f 15 and 20.
But, regardless o f the fact that there is no sudden noticeable
mental growth during adolescence, many people become more inter
ested in the mental development o f boys and girls at this time. They
begin to consider a little more seriously how far they can go in
school and to what advantage; what they are best fitted to do
vocationally; and, in general, what their special capacities and
special disabilities are. Obviously these are questions that can be
answered only after careful study o f the individual boy or girl.
But for those lay readers who would like a better understanding
o f some o f the factors involved in such a study the following
discussion may be o f some value.
21

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M EASU REM ENT

AD O LESCEN T

O F IN T E L L IG E N C E

Within the last 20 years a large number and variety of so-called
“ tests ” for the measurement o f various mental processes have been
devised. There are tests of memory, perception, attention, motor
coordination, comprehension, suggestibility, judgment, imagination,
range of emotional response, learning ability, initiative, and so on.
Some o f these tests have proved unsatisfactory; they have befen found
to reveal acquired learning rather than native ability or to make in
sufficient allowance for environmental factors or differences of per
sonality. But through their continued use in large numbers of cases
and through comparison o f the resulting scores with such ordinary
standards of judgment as school grades and personal impressions, a
number o f very useful tests have been developed. They are being
used throughout the world for purposes of classifying children in
schools, making vocational plans and recommendations, studying the
special problems of individual children, and carrying on experi
ments in various fields of research. Essentially they do nothing more
than sample the various intellectual processes; each sample is then
scored, and the intelligence as a whole is estimated on the basis o f
the total score.
The individual’s score may be rated in comparison with that o f his
fellow classmates, to give an estimate of his class rank, or it may be
computed in terms of the ratio between his mental age, as determined
in the test, and his chronological age in years and months, to give his
intelligence quotient (I.Q .).
Duncan was 10 years and 11 months of age when he was tested. H e was
given the usual tests for the average 5-year old, the 6 -year old, and the
7-year old. He could do most of the 5-year items and some of the 6-year items
but failed practically all the 7-year items. In actual points he scored a mental
age of 5 years and 7 months.
It is apparent that a child almost 11 years of age with the mental develop
ment of a child between 5 and 6 years of age must be mentally retarded. The
I.Q. is a convenient way of telling how much he is retarded, for Duncan’s I.Q.
would be 51 as compared with the normal I.Q. of 100.

Thus when the mental age is below the chronological age, the child
may be said to be in varying degrees slow or retarded; when the two
are equal, the child may be said to be average; when the mental age
is above the chronological age, the child may be looked upon as
accelerated or superior. To be sure, a range o f 10 points more or less
must be allowed for possible error due to factors not under control.
But, in a general way, the boy or girl can thus be classified in relation
to the great numbers of boys and girls of the same age who have
been similarly tested.
In order to be o f any use such intelligence testing must be done by
well-trained people who have had wide experience with growing chil
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dren under test conditions. Moreover the test results must be inter
preted in the light o f the norms established by tests in the past.
Even then the test should not he regarded as the last word and fined
verdict regarding the child. On the contrary, it should be considered
only as a point of departure to be supplemented by his medical his
tory, consideration o f his environmental limitations and opportuni
ties, a history of his actual school achievement and his social adjust
ment, and further study o f such particular aptitudes or handicaps as
he may manifest.
It is o f greatest importance that parents understand the nature of
this type o f intelligence test. The interesting publicity given in recent
years to various kinds o f “ mental testing ” has had the unfortunate
effect of confusing and misleading lay readers as to the purpose of
psychological examination before they ever had a chance to under
stand what it was all about. It is perfectly true that psychologists
and criminologists have been working out tests for the purpose of
discovering guilt reactions in individuals suspected o f lying, stealing,
and other delinquencies and offenses. It is also true that psychiatrists
and psychologists have been working out tests for the purpose o f
discovering abnormal emotional reactions as an aid to establishing a
diagnosis o f insanity. But these tests are as distinct from the ordi
nary intelligence tests as laboratory tests for the presence o f tuber
culosis are distinct from the routine weighing and measuring done
in the public schools. Parents sometimes ask whether the intelligence
tests given to their children are not the same as those used to deter
mine whether or not a child is feeble-minded, and no doubt they
feel that i f this is the case they do not wish their children to be
contaminated by such a procedure. They forget that there is only
one kind o f scale fo r weighing overweight, underweight, and aver
age-weight human beings and that it is no disgrace to be found of
normal weight on the same scale which showed someone else to be
overweight or underweight.
So much for the nature of intelligence tests. Now let us consider
their application.
THE SLOW MIND

In this bulletin no attempt will be made to deal with the problems
o f the defective or severely retarded individual, first because this
discussion is limited to the problems o f normal adolescents and,
secondly, because the problems o f the defective boy or girl must
ordinarily be met and dealt with before the time o f adolescence.
The problems o f the mentally slow child, on the other hand, are often
not recognized until he reaches the upper grades.
E ric had entered school at the a£e of 6 and, by plodding along diligently,
had managed to reach the fifth grade at the age of 12. It was obvious that he

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was not doing particularly well at school; yet he seemed to have an excellent
memory and to be clever in the use of his hands, and therefore his mediocre
work was attributed simply to “ poor concentration” and “ lack o f attention.”
Eric was an obedient child and apparently happy. Consequently no one
worried about his poor work until his fifth-grade teacher was obliged to demote
him to the fourth grade. Eric seemed quite indifferent to this procedure, and
his parents began to wonder what the trouble could be.
A psychological examination revealed that Eric’s mental age was fully 2
years below his chronological a g e; in other words, he was not mentally ready
for fifth-grade work. H is good memory had helped him to acquire a consid
erable store of general information, which up to this point had covered up his
helplessness in working out new problems and grasping new situations.
Eric’s parents accepted these facts, and instead of trying to push their son
beyond his capacity in an effort to haye him keep in step with the boys o f his
age, they undertook to find out more about his particular liabilities and assets.
Next they set about to learn all they could concerning the types of vocation
which would be open to him and in which he could use his manual skill, his
perseverance, his cooperative spirit, and his other assets to the best advantage
and to his own greater happiness. They took an eager interest in his plans for
getting the necessary vocational training. Instead of preparing for disappoint
ment over Eric’s inability to acquire a college degree, they prepared themselves
to take pleasure and pride in such work as would ultimately provide their son
with opportunities for success and happiness.

This story o f Eric illustrates three important principles to be
observed by parents and teachers in planning for the boy or girl with
a slow mind: (1) The necessity o f giving frank and early recogni
tion to whatever handicap he may have; (2) the importance o f plac
ing him properly in school so that he will not have to struggle
beyond his capacity, or constantly experience a sense o f discourage
ment and failure; (3) the wisdom of planning for the child’s great
est satisfaction and happiness rather than for the fulfillment of
parental ambition.
THE

AVERAGE

M IN D

It would seem as if the youngster with an average mind would
be the last to require any special consideration and that life would
present no ¿special problems to him nor to his parents, but it is the
nature of man never to be content with his lot. Nor can it be
denied that when the individual with an average mind is obliged
to compete with a group o f individuals having superior minds, he is
at as. great a disadvantage as 12-year-old Eric would have been in the
fifth or sixth grade. This is well illustrated by Adeline’s predica
ment.
Adeline was 10 years and 2 months of age and was in the fifth grade of
a good private school. H er teachers were not satisfied with her work and,
thinking that she might be mentally retarded, suggested that she be given
a psychological examination. The psychologist found her to have a mental

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DEVELOPM ENT

age o f 11 years and an I.Q. of 108, indicative of a good average mind. This
was reported to the school, but the principal’s reply was in'effect as follow s:
Adeline’s I.Q. of 108 might well be considered eight points above the norm
according to some standards; but, inasmuch as the majority of children in
this private school had an I.Q. o f 120 or higher, Adeline’s I.Q. o f 108 had
to be considered below average. In other words, she was competing with a
group of superior children who were naturally setting too fast a pace for
her. It was, of course, advisable to transfer her to a school in which she
could hold her own with fifth-graders who were more nearly her equal.

“ Average ” , like “ inferior” and “ superior” , is but a relative
term; and the individual who is average as compared to the general
population or to the standard test scale is no longer average when
compared to a selected group who, by reason of their superiority,
are going on to special schools and colleges. Even within the family
group, the individual with average ability may seem inferior. This
is well illustrated in the following case1:
W arren was a boy with an “ average ” mental equipment. He went through
the elementary grades without any special difficulty and was standing above
the middle o f his class when he finished the sixth grade at the age of 11%
years. H e began to slump in the seventh grade, and by the time he had
reached the eighth grade his work had become so poor and was done so care
lessly that his father had to begin helping him at home.
Warren’s father was a clergyman. Little is known about the early relation
between father and son. The mother reported that on one occasion the father
had cried out impatiently something about Warren’s being a “ stu pid” fellow
who never could learn anything. She attached considerable importance to this
and thought it accounted for his feeling of inferiority.
It was not until Warren entered high school, however, that the trouble
became acute.
H is father’s own description o f this experience is most
enlightening:
“ Warren’s first year in high school was very bad for him. He was taking
the college-preparatory course. I gave him constant attention, assisting him
with his Latin and algebra, and, toward the end of the year, with his ancient
history. He did his English by himself, but I think he would have failed in
this if his teacher had set proper standards.
In March he became very
nervous, and it was evident that he could not carry all the work. He dropped
his Latin and, by dint of personal attention from me, succeeded in getting
through the rest of his studies.
“ H e spent the summer at camp and did very well, winning the camp letter
and passing the Junior Red Cross life-saving test.
“ In the fall he returned again to the local high school.
“ It soon became evident that he could not carry the work without a great
deal o f help. He was very greatly discouraged and nervous. When I worked
with him he would get ‘ nerved up.’ It was wearing on me. A t this point
his mother took things practically into her own hands and made arrangements
for him to go to a private school.
“ H e appears to have been very happy and to have behaved well, but he
has failed most of his subjects.”
1 Thom, Douglas A . : Normal Youth and Its Everyday Problems, pp. 8 9 -9 1 . D. Appleton
& Co., New York, 1932.

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The father’s letter then continues with a revealing description of the boy s
behavior:
“ One of the marked features o f his case is that he refers to himself as a
‘ dumbbell ’ and says that he will never amount to anything. One night this
June, after he had been at home for about 2 weeks, he had a bitter crying
spell about his failure in school and said that he would have to go off and
live as a hermit for the rest of his life, as he could not be of any use in the
world.
“ He teases his younger brothers and that has many times led to bad quar
rels. A t times he has exasperated me almost to distraction by his insolence.
I used to give him corporal punishment, and I have at times struck him in
anger. I am fully aware that I have not always dealt calmly and wisely
with him.
“ Since he has been back from New Hampshire, he has been working in
a local store, using an adding machine and doing miscellaneous clerical work.
So far he has not been discharged. H e seems happy in this work and likes
both his superiors and his associates.
“ So far as we know, he is clean morally. He does not smoke.
This serves, perhaps, to suggest enough of the father’s attitude. H is letter
continues for several more pages in the same vein. H e is chagrined to the
limits of his power of self-control that he, a man who has always set great
store by intellectual accomplishments and w as always successful in his own
scholastic endeavors, would have so stupid and dull a so n !
H e is puzzled, as well as chagrined. W h y should this have happened? Is
he to blame? Possibly he has been too severe w ith the boy? Yet he has
helped him with his lessons; he has sept, him to camp for several summers;
he has had his tonsils removed; he has had him examined annually by a
specialist in preventive medicine; and he has had him tested annually, since
the age of 12, by a consulting psychologist who recommended the collegepreparatory course. Something must be wrong with him. H e suggests several
possibilities. Instruments had been used on his head at birth. Could this have
affected his mind?
He had had diphtheria and colitis as a young child.
W ould either of these contribute to his present condition? H e had not yet
developed sexually as far as other boys of his age. Could this be an important
factor? Or was his behavior indicative of some nervous or mental disorder?
The one explanation which does not suggest itself to him or which he
refuses to admit, is that his son may have been born with no more than
average mental ability and that his own critical, overambitious, and extremely
emotional attitude has aroused such conflicts in the boy that he is unable to
make the best use o f even his limited ability.

The principles to be observed in guiding the adolescent with aver
age ability are but variations o f those to be observed in planning for
the child with the slow mind: (1) The necessity o f recognizing the
child’s ability for what it is; (2) the importance o f placing him
properly in school so that his powers will be developed to their max
imum fulfillment and yet not subjected to competition that would
lead only to failure; and (3) the wisdom of guiding the child toward
his own satisfaction and happiness rather than toward the goal
set by parental ambition.

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THE SUPERIOR MIND

That the mentally superior child may perplex his parents and
become a problem to himself is a not uncommon assumption. Peo
ple have innumerable theories about the vagaries o f children with
superior endowment. They may be convinced that brilliant children
are usually poor specimens so. far as physical development is con
cerned ; or that they are inclined to be introspective, absent-minded
bookworms with no sense about practical matters 5 or that they are
selfish, egocentric individuals who are ever greedy for more learning
and more college degrees regardless o f the economic cost to their
parents or the necessary sacrifice o f the aspirations of brothers and
sisters; or that gifted children turn out to be dull adults; or that
highly intellectual boys and girls make poor social adjustments
and later become the crochety, cantankerous, neurotic, or psychotic
members o f society. Nor are these theories and beliefs drawn from
thin air. They have their basis in practically everyday observation
and experience. Everyone knows men and women whom the above
descriptions would seem to fit perfectly. None the less, the conclu
sion that their maladjustments, their faults, and their failures are
due to, or necessarily connected with, intellectual superiority is
fallacious.
Terman’s recent studies o f intellectually superior children all tend
to show that true intellectual superiority is usually accompanied by
superiority in other respects, as, for example, physical health and
social adaptability. I f these boys and girls later turn out to be
lopsided, topheavy, or otherwise unbalanced individuals, does the
fault lie in their intellectual superiority in itself ? Does it not rather
lie in the fact that they have been encouraged by ambitious parents
and eager teachers to spend all their time and energy in developing
their intellects to the exclusion of their other faculties? Perhaps
poverty has made it necessary for them to be self-supporting while
receiving their education, so that all the time not spent in class or at
study has been spent at work, and little, if any, time has been left
for leisurely companionship with fellow students, or for participa
tion in sports, in group activities, or in any other form o f play and
recreation. Possibly they have come from a family whose social
background is markedly inferior to that o f their intellectual equals,
so that they have always felt unable to enjoy the intimate com
panionship o f the very people with whom they might otherwise have
had most in common. A ll these factors, and more, have undoubtedly
contributed to the maladjustments o f some highly endowed indi
viduals. A specific instance will illustrate this situation.
182415°— 33------ 3

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Nick was only 12 when he entered high school. H e was a little shaver with
a sweet, baby face— the kind of youngster who is promptly designated as
“ cute ” and accepted as a pet by teachers and classmates alike. H is superior
intelligence had been amply appreciated by his grade-school teachers, who
had pushed him rapidly ahead, much to the satisfaction o f his parents, and
his high-school enrollment was looked upon as a dramatic event.
In the small grade school, where no sharp dividing line existed between
grades as such, Nick had managed to have a pretty good time. There were
always boys o f his size and interests on the playground, and he had his
neighborhood pals. The matter of his being a grade or two ahead of some of his
chums gave him a little added prestige when it came to club elections, but he
still remained “ one of the bunch.”
On entering high school Nick gradually found himself cut off from his old
associates. He could no longer walk home from school with them ; he some
times had algebra or Latin assignments to do when the “ gang ” were getting
together for some activity; he had to attend a high school class meeting or a
game on the night when the old club had its meeting; and then, even when
he did see them he was, after all, a high-school boy and no longer one of
them. To be sure, the logical step would have been for Nick now to throw in
his lot with the high-school group. But physically he was small even for his
age and could not well compete with his classmates on the football field or in
the gymnasium. H e received cordial invitations to various clubs, but he was
petted and teased and shown off and it was obvious that no matter how much
he was liked he was not accepted as an equal.
Then the. work itself proved taxing; for although he had a superior mind,
he was still a little boy in many ways and was not yet ready to settle down
to concentrated effort on conjugations and declensions, though he knew that
high marks were expected of him.
He came through the first year creditably enough. But the second year was
bad from the very start. People had become accustomed to the novelty of
seeing this “ cute little fellow ” in their midst and no longer made such a fuss
about him. Moreover, he was beginning to grow a little, and as new freshmen
came he was no longer such an unusual figure. He had not had a chance to
make a real place for himself in athletics or outside activities during the first
year and, therefore, had little to offer as a bid for popularity the second. One
day, in an effort to win recognition as a “ regular fellow ” , he accepted a dare
to smoke. The after effects were bad, the whole affair became a joke, and for
a while life seemed pretty burdensome. Nick found himself with nothing but
hard work to do and there was no satisfaction in it, especially as his marks
fell lower and lower.

Modern American educators and psychologists seem to agree that
it is far wiser to enrich the course of the superior child than to push
him ahead. I f Nick’s physical development had been as greatly
advanced as his intellectual development, probably the promotion to
high school would have proved an easy and pleasant experience. In
view o f his small size and his general immaturity it would have been
far better, however, to let him take the last few grades at school
more slowly, with additional work in outside reading, as for instance,
in ancient history, in folklore and mythology, in biography, in the
history o f art and music, or in the sciences. ¡Some schools definitely

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plan for such extensions o f their curriculum, adding projects to be
worked out in class providing adequate activity and stimulation for
the bright boy and girl. Even when this is not provided by the
school, parents can often guide and direct such pursuits. The in
creasing popularity o f the junior high school which bridges the gap
between the grade-school group and the mature high-school group
contributes to the solution o f such dilemmas. For, after all, the
child with superior endowment often presents a dilemma.
The fact that 12-year-old Alma, whose mental age was 3 years ahead of
her chronological age, was flunking all her grade-school work because it was
not sufficiently interesting or stimulating to hold her attention, illustrates the
folly of holding the bright child back. The discovery that she was really
bright was as much of a surprise to her as to her teachers, and almost at once
she began to do more difficult work in a more satisfactory manner.

The same three principles apply in dealing with the superior
child: ( 1 ) The necessity for recognizing the superior ability for what
it is, meanwhile taking stock o f the physical development and person
ality traits that go with it; ( 2 ) the importance of placing the child
properly in school, with reference not only to his mental age but also
to his size and his general level o f maturity; and ( 3 ) the wisdom
o f guiding the adolescent toward becoming a well-adjusted and
happy individual rather than merely an efficient set o f brain cells.
SPECIAL ABILITIES AND DISABILITIES

Certain special abilities and disabilities, talents, and intellectual
handicaps or defects occur not uncommonly. Examples o f individ
uals remarkable for such special abilities and disabilities are known
to everyone; there are individuals with extraordinary visual mem
ories enabling them to visualize a printed page and thus recall to
memory names and dates as if they were reading them; there are
individuals with extraordinary auditory memories who can recite
a poem or retain the tune o f a song after hearing it but once; there
are some individuals who earn a livelihood by showing off their
ability as lightning calculators; and in contrast to all o f these, there
are the students who have “ a wretched memory ” , 44 no ear for a
tune ” , or 44 no head for figures.”
Special abilities or disabilities may be a part of the intellectual
equipment o f the feeble-minded, the average, or the superior individ
ual. It is, therefore, not sufficient to recognize the special ability
or disability without also recognizing the general level o f intelligence
that goes with it. The father who said, 44 My son can draw well
and could make a good cartoonist, but he has no ideas ” , showed
good insight into the relation between a special ability and general
intelligence, and also a good appreciation o f his son’s equipment.

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He realized that his son had superior ability in drawing but that
his general level o f intelligence was low.
This does not indicate that the special ability should be neglected
or even that it should not be cultivated. The danger lies in build
ing the young person’s entire life around his one strong point re
gardless o f his possible inability to bring the rest of his life up to
this peak. One would not think o f trying to make a tennis cham
pion out o f a boy merely because he had a good stroke and a good
eye for his ball, without considering the condition o f his heart and
his general physical reaction to exercise; yet the mere fact that he
is not up to the strenuous practice and the excitement o f a profes
sional tournament need not debar him from enjoying amateur games.
It is even more disastrous, however, to build the young person’s
life around a disability and to say, for example, that there is no
point in continuing his education because he can never learn to spell,
or to classify him once and for all as stupid and dull because he
has a poor visual memory or difficulty in reading. Beading disabil
ities, although they often go unrecognized, are relatively common
and sometimes cause serious problems. In recent years much ex
perimental work has been done in an effort to discover ways and
means o f helping individuals to overcome or compensate for such
special disabilities. Special instruction, once the disability is recog
nized, will often help greatly in overcoming it. But even where
it is not possible to provide such remedial assistance, it is still pos
sible to prevent young people from looking upon a particular han
dicap as the stumbling block in the way o f happiness regardless of
the road pursued.
Naturally the special ability has certain advantages over the dis
ability, for it can often be capitalized with appreciable success. A
good memory can be capitalized in dozens o f ways and may com
pletely conceal from the general public an otherwise inferior mind;
but a poor memory—of what possible advantage can it be save to
serve as a convenient excuse for failure ?
Although the psychologists and their intelligence tests have con
tributed to an appreciative understanding o f these deviations of the
human mind, and although it may be necessary to turn to them for
an expert opinion or a final word o f advice when in doubt as to the
best plan for an individual child, there is no reason why parents
and teachers should not be able to recognize some o f these things
from their own observation and take such steps as seem wise to
overcome the handicap.

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THE INDIVIDUAL AS A WHOLE
It is a commonplace o f experience to see young men and women with bril
liant minds and healthy bodies occupying secondary places in every walk of
life, though their training entitles them to first places, simply because their
personalities are like vinegar to the teeth and smoke to the eyes. (Richards,
Esther Loring, M .D .: Behaviour Aspects of Child Conduct, p. 217. Macmillan
Co., New York, 1932.)

Notwithstanding the fact that we study the physical growth and
development o f the child, that we investigate with keen interest
his varied habits and conduct patterns, we still are confronted with
the necessity o f measuring success or failure in life in terms o f how
well all these varied aspects o f the total individual are coordinating
one with the other. After all is said and done, a good intellect,
sound bodily health, and what are commonly called “ good habits ”
all may work out to no useful purpose unless they are so operating
as to make a harmonious unity.
How frequently we hear a remark like this: “ Why is it that John
never really accomplished anything in life? He came from a good
family, was well educated, and never had any real sickness. He
works hard, has clean habits, and is perfectly straight, yet he has
never gone very far in business. He doesn’t make friends easily,
and he seems to be getting so little out of life. John has never
quite fitted into, the scheme o f things socially, and he realizes it quite
as well as his neighbors, but nobody knows why this is so.”
John’s failure to make the grade in life is not a problem that can
be solved by casual observation; it is one o f those situations which
is very complicated and involved, frequently leading back to child
hood. Parental attitudes and early experiences which have resulted
in warping his point of view on life or giving him a false evaluation
o f his own relation to the world are the most common causes for
his failure.
The world is full o f Johns—individuals who are failing to make
life as full as they should either for themselves or for those with
whom they come in contact. The twists in personality which account
for failure and unhappiness are not introduced into the life o f the
individual suddenly and unexpectedly; invariably they are the result
o f a very slow, insidious process, being the effect of the environment
over a long period o f years. One does not have to wait until the
child reaches the adolescent age to determine the evidence of impend31

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ing danger. A ll his habits and personality traits are in the process
o f development from birth, and it is fortunate indeed that the
efficiency o f an individual at any given age level can be measured
with a fair degree of success.
People are inclined to think of maturity as a definite state to be
reached much as if it were the end o f a journey. It would be better
to think o f it aa an ever-receding goal toward which we begin to
march at birth and go on to the end o f life. W e can check up at
any given point and find out whether or not we are on time, so to
speak, or have covered the allotted distance for any given period. In
other words, there is a fairly well recognized standard for maturity
at 3 years o f age just as there is at 13, and the adequacy with which
the individual’s total personality is progressing can always be meas
ured in terms o f his maturity for any given age. The 3-year old who
wets the bed, refuses to eat unless fed, and demands that his parents
rock him to sleep is immature. The 8 -year-old boy who needs con
stant supervision for his leisure time, who needs help in dressing and
undressing, who sets up a howl when his parents go away, leaving
him well cared for while they take a short vacation, is immature.
The 14-year-old boy who is irresponsible about his school work and
chores, who is given to chronic grouches if he cannot have his own
way, who must have someone tell him what clothes to wear, who
needs to have all his activities planned for him, is also immature.
So is the adult immature who cannot stand authority, who is ex
tremely selfish, who meets all difficulties by running away, who uses
alcohol as a retreat or illness as an excuse.
The immaturity of the child during the preadolescent years is pri
marily a matter o f concern to his parents, but early in adolescence
other people, particularly those of the same age group, begin to
impose certain very definite standards upon youth, holding them
more rigidly accountable for their conduct during this period. The
adolescent himself becomes more and more aware at this time of his
own maturity or immaturity. He is inclined to compare himself
with others o f his own age and social setting and feels inferior if he
does not measure up to them.
The standards mentioned for maturity at adolescence are not so
well defined as those for the preschool years, for as the child grows
up his reactions to life become more and more affected by his past
experiences and these experiences are never the same for any two
individuals. There are, however, certain types o f reaction which are
definitely immature and therefore are not acceptable to the group to
which he logically belongs.
Julius, for example, was described as immature by all his high-school teachers.
When they were requested to give specific examples of what they meant by
“ immature ” , one teacher pointed out that although Julius was 18 years of age

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TH E I

Agri€iitoala6JMitd3(aiHcal College ofT$&

and a senior in high school, he still p ro£fi$$gfe SfeliO Ot ifeft&h. to school
and still seemed as enthusiastic about junior scouting as the average 12-year
o ld ; another mentioned the fact that he did not seem to mix well with boys of
his own age, that the latter did not pay any attention to h im ; another called
attention to his class work, which was distinctly below the level expected of a
boy o f his a g e ; and the principal added a report concerning this boy’s lack of
emotional control demonstrated in his own office one day when Julius, aged 18,
burst into tears and begged him not to tell his mother that he had skipped one
o f his classes.
This boy’s mother gave a very similar picture of his behavior at home. She
thought this was all due to lack of ambition and stressed the fact that his
younger brother was able to find part-time jobs even when Julius could not,
because the younger brother was more ambitious.
The school psychologist attributed Julius’ poor adjustment to his mediocre
intellectual equipment, concluding that his social behavior could not be expected
to be more mature than his mental age.
But Julius’ social behavior was actually below even his mental age, and
explanation had to be sought still further. I t was learned that this boy had
been born in a small country town, where he had spent a happy boyhood.
When he was about -10 years of age, his parents had been divorced and his
mother had moved to a large industrial city with her two sons. Julius had
been very fond o f his fath er; and although his mother never discussed the
parental separation or the father’s remarriage, the boy understood that his
father was under a cloud. He was vaguely unhappy about this and about
being so far away from his father and from the town and neighborhood in
which he had been happy. H e could not get used to the city boys and their
ways, nor to the city schools. The more leisurely pace o f life in the country
town was much more to his liking. H e happened to find a certain amount of
comfortable companionship in a Boy Scout troop; doubtless, too, the Scout
leader acted as a substitute for his father. Thus he stayed on even though all
o f the other boys o f his age had dropped out.
And so he was called immature, as indeed he was compared to other 18-yearold city boys, or even compared to his younger brother who was also born in the
country, or compared to other boys with his mediocre intellectual equipment.
The combination of unfavorable circumstances and small native endowment
presented too difficult a situation for him to be able to meet adequately. H e
might have been considered mature in his country-town environment, in spite
of his limited mental ability; he might have been considered mature i f he had
had higher intellectual ability even if he had moved to the industrial c ity ; and
he might have been considered mature if his fam ily life had remained normal
and stable in spite o f the existence of the other factors. Another boy might
have reacted to this situation by becoming very responsible and even over
mature, trying to relieve his mother o f some o f her burdens and help her to
bring up the younger brother. But for Julius this reaction was not possible.

Another type of immaturity is illustrated by Ellen, who was the second oldest
in a family of five girls. Ellen was 20 years of age when her mother began to
be worried about her apparent immaturity. Her mother thought that the girl
had a good mind but was too lazy to use it and that all her interest was
centered in herself and her own activities so that she had none to spare for
what her mother considered the big issues of life.
Most distressing of all was the daughter’s attitude toward her engagement.
Ellen was wearing some lad’s fraternity pin and considered herself “ as good

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as engaged ”, but her mother knew that the acquaintanceship between these
two young people had been very brief and that previously Ellen had displayed
a similar enthusiasm for another boy. This mother regarded an engagement
as a serious relationship and a relationship preceding marriage, and Ellen’s
attitude of more or less playing with the idea of an engagement naturally
seemed immature.
Although girls of the present generation do not marry at as early an age as
their mothers did, the casual attitude to which this mother objected is not the
only alternative to an early marriage, and she was right in regarding her
daughter as immature. It is to be expected that at 2D, young people will have
sufficient appreciation of what is serious in life no longer to play with personal
relationships in a childish way.
What this mother did not seem to realize, however, was that Ellen’s imma
turity had probably not happened all at once. She could have observed
earlier that her daughter was growing up to be a selfish young woman inter
ested only in her own pleasures, with no thought of consequences, no considera
tion for other people, and no care for the future. The mother seemed to
take her own life seriously. Why should her daughter have such a superficial
outlook on life? Probably because this mother had taken a keen delight in
being able to provide for her daughters many of the luxuries which she
herself had not enjoyed, surrounding them with comforts, relieving them of
all burdens and obligations, and making life just as pleasant and easy as
possible for them. She had helped these girls to go through adolescence with
little to do but have a good time, and then she wondered why at 20 Ellen
seemed immature.

People become mature by assuming obligations and responsibili
ties and by having to do things for themselves and others. I f a
mother continues to dress her little boy until he is 8 years of age,
the boy will be considered immature for being unable to dress
himself, even though his mother is responsible for this immaturity.
So the parents who indulge their adolescents, letting them think of
life as their happy playground, are themselves responsible for the
immaturity which may manifest itself as a superficial outlook on life.
Often enough the growing boy and girl are ready for more re
sponsibility and independence than their parents are willing to
give them. They resent being “ babied” and begin to struggle for
more freedom. They may feel, for instance, that they are old
enough to know when to go to bed without being told, or that they
should not have to ask permission every time they wish to go out
o f the house, or that it is humiliating to ask separately for each
cent o f spending money.
Earl was a lusty 14-year old whose parents were completely at a loss to
know what to do with him. He came and went when he chose and refused to
answer any of their questions as to what he had been doing. He was ex
tremely sensitive to criticism and easily lost his temper when reproved. His
parents considered him selfish, thoughtless, and reckless, and were concerned
most of all with his utter disregard for authority.
This boy’s father was a militaristic individual who enjoyed giving orders
and expected them to be obeyed. He could not think of life except in terms
of laws and rules and regulations. When the members of his family did

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anything that displeased him, he would point out that the laws of the State—
or the church— gave him the right to insist on such and such behavior and
imposed on the rest o f the fam ily the duty o f obeying. Whenever there were
not enough laws to meet the situation, he made some rules and regulations
o f his own and expected them to be honored as rigidly as if they had been
imposed by the State.
Now, rules and regulations in a household are vitally essential if family
life is to be an orderly, harmonious, and educational experience. It is an
excellent thing, for example, to have a regulation that the preschool child
have supper alone at 5 o’clock and be put to bed at 6, before the rest o f the
fam ily sit down to their evening meal. But few parents would insist that
this regulation be enforced after the child reaches the age of 7, 8, or 9. Yet
Earl’s father was doing this very thing when he insisted that his 14-year-old
boy observe all the rules and regulations he had imposed upon him in early
childhood.
It is not to be assumed that a t 14 Earl should have been allowed every liberty.
But at 14 he should be expected to exercise a certain amount of independent
judgment regarding his activities. When a boy is 14 it should no longer be
necessary to tell him to wash his hands for supper nor to check up on how he
spent every minute of the day or every cent of his money. His early training
should insure his using common sense in these matters, and an occasional
friendly expression of interest will be far more effective than a daily crossexamination in helping him to maintain as satisfactory a standard of conduct
when he is “ on his own ” as when he was completely under parental control.
I t was suggested to Earl and his parents that the latter drop some o f their
rules and regulations about matters of minor importance and that the former
really assume some responsibility for manly conduct and prove himself deserv
ing of the independence he so much craved. After several months of ups and
downs, fam ily life in this home began to take on a brighter and more har
monious air. Earl was obviously a much happier boy, and at the same time
his parents were much better pleased with his conduct.

One o f the specific ways in which the parent can help the
adolescent to become independent is in connection with the spending
o f money. The problem o f training in the use and value o f money is
not one which belongs to the adolescent years. The child who
reaches this period o f his social development without some very
definite and well-thought-out ideas about the earning, saving, and
giving o f money and, in a more general way, the budgeting o f his
income regardless o f the source from which it may be derived, has
missed something very important that has much to contribute to the
efficiency with which he will meet many of the practical problems o f
living later on.
Although this training should be started long before the child
reaches the adolescent period, it may not be out of place to state that
every child should be given an allowance, small though it may be,
just as soon as he is old enough to realize the varied purposes which
money serves—that is, as soon as he is called upon to use it for giving,
buying, or saving. When he reaches that stage of mental and
physical maturity at which he has something definite to contribute in

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the way of labor that has money value, he should be given the oppor
tunity of finding out for himself just how much time and effort has
to be spent in order that he may receive a well-earned nickel or dime.
The wise parent will teach the child to distinguish between money
given to him in order that he may meet his daily obligations and
learn how to manage his finances, and money that represents payment
for service o f real value.
There is a marked difference between compensation for a job
well done and a bribe that is given to induce the child to perform
some task which he should have performed because it was the right
thing to do. Notwithstanding the fact that the training in the use
o f money begins early in the life of the child, it is one of those
problems which is rarely settled satisfactorily for all time. It keeps
bobbing up, demanding decisions in the light of new experiences,
new demands, new opportunities, and new situations. It is quite
as important to know when to spend and how to spend wisely as it
is how to save. Many people never learn how to give without
reluctance, while others give lavishly but without judgment, fre
quently doing more harm than good. Children should learn at an
early age that there is pleasure in work and that they are entitled
to the rewards of their efforts. Rewards in the form of money
earned by honest toil, especially when they entail the giving up of
playtime or a holiday, or acquired through some other sacrifice will
be less likely to be squandered foolishly than will be the unexpected
gift or even the taken-for-granted allowance.
Most boys and girls in their teens do not enjoy asking their
parents for every dime to be spent on carfare, every quarter for
lunch, and every half dollar for a hair cut. I f they are working on
a part-time job, they may be earning enough to take care o f these
small needs, but whether the money comes from their own earnings
or from their parents’ pocket, they should undoubtedly have some
thing definite in the way of an allowance and they should be given a
certain latitude in spending it.
Sometimes the resentment o f authority and the rebelliousness
against close supervision is manifested as a personal dislike and
even hatred o f the child for his parent.
B etsy, for example, was so angry and upset when her mother sent her to
camp against her will that she refused to say good-bye to her, and all her
letters home contained but three words for her m other; namely, “ I hate
you.” Even at 12% years the girl was too mature to be sent off to camp with
out having some choice in the matter— particularly when she so obviously
disliked the idea. Her resentment against being disposed of in this per
emptory fashion found a natural expression in a personal hatred. It was not
a new resentment and did not spring up overnight; it had been in the making
for a long time and had previously expressed itself in Betsy’s refusal to
confide in her mother. Her attitude seemed to be, “ You can force me to do

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things I don’t want to do and prevent my doing things I want to do, but you
can’t make me tell you anything unless I want to and you can’t know my
own thoughts.” She took an almost fierce delight in being secretive and in
thwarting all her mother’s efforts to come close to her.

During adolescence the individual becomes more keenly aware of
his thoughts as personal possessions. Not only can he keep them to
himself, but he can think in opposition to his parents. Fiction and
biography both contain innumerable descriptions of adolescents who
suddenly find that there are nice people whose views on questions
o f religion, economics, politics, education, science, personal rela
tionships, and conduct are diametrically opposed to those entertained
by their parents. Often enough the adolescent finds that these
people are not so bad nor so stupid as he has been led to believe.
Perhaps, on the contrary, their outlook on life seems more intelli
gent and more agreeable than that o f the parents.
This discovery and the adolescent’s consequent refusal to adhere
any longer to the point o f view o f his parents very often resolves
itself into as much o f a struggle as the adolescent’s refusal to return
home at the hour set, or to obey some other parental command. Fre
quently the struggle resolves itself into some individual issue: The
adolescent insists on going to college despite his father’s conviction
that higher education unfits young people for meeting the practical
demands o f life; or he brings home boys and girls whose race,
religion, nationality, or economic or social status makes them unac
ceptable to his parents.
Sometimes there is no practical issue involved, and yet the har
mony o f family life is disrupted by the bitterness o f two opposing
systems o f thought. Parents and child may wage an intellectual
war, for instance, on the subject of free love or communism, which
the adolescent is utilizing as a means o f expressing some thoughts
independent o f his parents. He may not have the slightest inten
tion o f becoming a communist; but by arguing in favor o f com
munism, he is expressing rebellion and resentment toward parental
authority. He may not have the slightest desire to participate in
free-love relationships, but he is trying to prove to himself as well
as to his parents that he is capable o f thinking his own thoughts
and arriving at his own conclusions.
The desire for personal independence and more control over one’s
own activities or thoughts is so normal an aspect o f adolescence that
the boy or girl who clings to his parents and fears to take any step
that might possibly lead him further away from the security and
protection o f childhood is considered overdependent or immature.
Thus, Judith, who at 14 was unable to adjust herself to boarding-school life
because of homesickness, might well be considered abnormally dependent.

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Judith got on well with, girls in school, made friends easily, and seemed to
be well liked; but she was so used to the constant solicitude with which
her mother had surrounded her and so dependent upon her mother’s good-night
kiss, her mother’s suggestions as to what to wear, her mother’s thoughtfulness
about her meals, her mother’s interest in all her little physical complaints,
and her mother’s endearments that she felt utterly lost without her. Even
the daily letters which overflowed with sentimentality were not enough to
give her the sense of closeness to her mother that she needed. She became
so weepy and hysterical that she finally had to be sent home.

Judith’s mother had very definitely contributed to her daughter’s
need and dependence upon her and was obviously preventing her
from growing up into a mature and independent young woman.
Often a mother glories in such a relationship with her children, find
ing pleasure in the fact that they cannot get along without her.
Such a mother is too selfish to realize that she is crippling her child
emotionally. She forgets that in the natural course o f events her
child is likely to outlive her and i f he has become completely de
pendent upon her, he will be lost without her. She fails to see that
she is preventing the child from finding his own place in the world
o f other people.
Raymond's first reaction to boarding school was much like Judith’s and
for a very similar reason. Instead o f crying and becoming hysterical, how
ever, he ran a w a y; and as soon as he was returned, he ran away again.
H e made every effort to get back to his mother, as she had been the one
who had protected him all his life against every hardship and sheltered him
from everything that was disagreeable. His father had always been stern
and severe with him and had considered him a weakling and a coward, but
his mother’s kind and gentle protectiveness had been ample consolation for
him. A t boarding school there were plenty of people who seemed stern and
forbidding and unsympathetic like his father, but there was no one gentle
and protective like his mother. Consequently his one desire was to get back
to her, to which end he continually ran away. In trying to shield this boy
from his father, the mother had merely succeeded in making him completely
dependent upon herself.

It is often necessary for a mother to act as a mediator between the
father and the child, particularly when the father is much older
than the children, or when he has been so much engrossed in his
business that he fails to appreciate the child’s point o f view, or when
he is exceptionally quick-tempered or exacting. But in such a
case the mother can accomplish far more both for the father and for
the child by endeavoring to give the father a better understanding
o f the child’s psychology and by showing an understanding o f the
father’s attitude than by assuming a frankly protective attitude
toward the child. Occasionally this situation arises with the father
acting as mediator between the mother and the child; but this is
less common, as usually the mother’s daily contact with her children
makes for a more patient and tolerant understanding of them.

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A ll of the child goes to school— not merely his intellect. H is mind is in the
custody o f his body, and his body affects his mind. H is emotions determine his
application and exertions, and his interests influence his emotions.
(W ile, Ira S.,
M .D .: “ Good ” Education and “ Bad ” Children. Mental Hygiene, vol. 9, no. 1
(January 1925), pp. 105-112.)

As might be expected, o f all the adolescent problems those con
cerning educational progress are the most common. Practically
every child, regardless o f his mental or physical development and
his social or economic status, is confronted with the task o f acquir
ing knowledge o f the world in which he lives. A s he advances
in years competition becomes more keen, and failures in academic
work become more common.
These failures are due only to a very limited degree to actual
intellectual inferiority. But, as has been pointed out, a child with
an average mind—an intelligence quotient ranging from 95 to 105—
may do very well in the lower grades but may not be able to survive
the keen competition with children of superior intelligence as he
advances to the higher grades and to high school. About one half
o f all the children entering public schools graduate from grammar
school; but less than one third get through high school, and only
1 out o f 10 graduates from college.
Parents who fail to appreciate the increased intellectual demands
that are made on children as they advance up this intellectual
ladder may be quite unjust in their criticisms o f those who fail.
Many a parent complains that Johnny could do the work in high
school if he only tried; and that he never had any trouble in gram
mar school, where he worked hard and was interested. This may
all be true, but many of these children are carrying intellectual
loads which are beyond their ability and interest, and they just
naturally lag behind and slacken in their efforts. It must be re
membered that on the physical side some have only a 6 -hour
capacity for standardized work, while others can carry on indefinitely
for 8 or 10 or 12 hours unimpaired by fatigue.
It is perhaps not difficult to understand why parents who are
but little concerned about the emotional life o f the child, perhaps
being quite oblivious to such personality traits as shyness, jealousy,
feelings o f inferiority, and the like, and those who are rather casual
about the physical growth and development, take this problem o f
39

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school failure so seriously. The parents seem to feel that such failure
indicates actual inferiority, and, either consciously or unconsciously,
they blame themselves. Teachers are prone to view failure as a
reflection upon their ability to teach, and they, too, frequently join
with the parents in pushing and prodding and generally harassing
this unfortunate group o f children.
It is therefore important to keep in mind that there is a fairly
large number o f boys and girls well developed physically, capable
of fitting into the varied social situations in life in a perfectly ade
quate way, who require a special type of instruction to meet their
particular needs. In attempting to help them acquire knowledge,
one should think in terms of breadth, rather than height; that is,
the boy or girl who reaches a mental age o f 13 or 14 is intellectually
capable o f acquiring a more useful and practical grasp o f those
essentials pertaining to the social, economic, and industrial aspects
of the world in which he lives than many students have at the
termination of a college course. It all depends upon the wisdom
with which these individuals are guided and directed.
There is another group of adolescents who run into scholastic
difficulties, not on account of mediocre or relatively poor intellectual
equipment, but rather on account of poor preparation. Many situa
tions encountered by the child during the school year contribute
to this particular difficulty. In some of the larger cities many
children enter school before they are mentally ready to do firstgrade work. Such children would do well to repeat the first grade;
but in the natural course of events, there is a new line of children
waiting and as the number of places in the first grade is limited,
they must move on. Consequently, each year children are pushed
ahead from grade to grade unfitted by their previous experience to
meet the task at hand. These children cannot be held back in
any large numbers because actual space in the schoolroom is not
available. But their inadequate preparation in early years, unless
recognized and corrected, will obviously lead to serious difficulties
during the adolescent period.
That group of children who are prevented from attending school
regularly on account of illness or perhaps some chronic physical
handicap must also be considered. They, too, are pushed along—
sometimes at the instigation of an ambitious parent, sometimes
because o f misdirected sympathy on the part o f a teacher, and then
again to make a place for someone else.
There are also a certain number o f students whose continuity in
school work is interrupted, sometimes unavoidably, by definite
changes that have to be made in their parents’ place o f abode. It
is no small portion o f the population that must seek employment

SOME EDUCATIONAL PITFALLS

wherever it is available. This problem arises in various social and
economic levels and may affect the minister or the teacher or the
mill workei. It can be easily seen that these periodic interruptions
m school work are definite factors contributing to failure.
B erth a s greatest handicap in doing successful school work was her constant
c a n g e o f schools. Her father was an Arm y officer whose particular activities
required frequent changes, and each change for him meant a different school
tor the girl. Not only was the continuity of her school work interrupted, but
he various methods in use in the different schools proved very confusing to
er. One year might be spent in a rather small, strictly supervised private
sc oo an the next year in a large public school where the students were
pretty much “ on their own.” It was not surprising that under such conditions,
J « Ch,*Were, prolonged over a Period of years, this girl not only encountered
ifficu ties due to the varied content of her work but also failed to acquire
any ability in dispensing her time wisely or concentrating well during the
time she actually devoted to her work.

Then there are those parents who build their lives entirely around
their own pleasures with an utter disregard for the welfare o f the
child, so that children are taken out of school because parents want
to travel, move to another neighborhood, pay a prolonged visit to
some relative, or follow some other whim. An example o f this may
be seen in the case o f Oliver.
Oliver s failure in school was due entirely to the fact that his parents wan
dered about so steadily in search o f pleasure and recreation that they denied
m m the opportunity of attending school for more than short periods at a time.
He was placed here and there for a term as it suited the fam ily’s convenience!
H e never learned to study, to make friends, nor to acquire that sense of
security which comes from being a part of a social group. In spite o f a per
fectly good intellectual equipment, he was totally inadequate to meet the
scholastic demands even on a level 2 or 3 years below his actual age.

Inability to concentrate is often given as a cause of failure to
acquire satisfactory passing marks. The ability to concentrate is a
gradual acquisition in the life of the child, and parents should make
an effort to see that they do not themselves interfere with this de
velopment by creating a program that is altogether too active for
him. Extracurricular activities are o f real educational value in giv
ing the young boy or girl greater opportunity for finding out what
life has to offer him and what he can contribute, but such activities
may be overdone. It may be that special interests for which the
child shows some talent are permitted to assume an importance
which they do not deserve. Too much parental interest can be
demonstrated in building radios and airplanes, in sketching, in
music and dancing lessons, and so forth, to the discouragement o f
any concentrated effort on the school work to be done.
Athletics, dramatics, and even the otherwise harmless associations
with those o f the opposite sex, may all become so diverting that the

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real purpose of school attendance is entirely overlooked. There
are those individuals who seem to be capable o f absorbing all these
varied interests and still maintaining a satisfactory average in their
school work. Most students, however, need considerable guidance
lest they spread their interests and energies so thin that none of their
activities receives adequate attention.
Roger is a good example o f a fine type of boy, well-endowed intel
lectually but so proficient in his athletic abilities that he just played
himself out o f high school, his teachers meanwhile looking on. There
is, of course, but little excuse for the head o f the school to allow any
boy with a perfectly good intellectual equipment to spend so much
o f his time on extracurricular activities that there is none left for
study.
Occasionally one finds failure in academic work to be due to lack
o f interest in the subject matter. This being true, the adolescent
will often seek for his intellectual satisfactions in outside reading
or other diversions which may in themselves be educational but
which do not contribute to his progress through the school. This may
mean that a change in the curriculum is advisable ; or, if the student
has a definite objective, such as college entrance, it will necessitate
his grasping the fact that certain subjects which he is required to
learn in school must be studied because they are a means to an end,
even though they hold no interest for him as an end in themselves.
Students o f the adolescent age should begin to realize that in adult
life one can spend but a limited amount o f time doing exactly the
things one would like to do. There are many obligations and respon
sibilities put on all o f us which we assume and carry out as part o f
the day’s task.
On account of the lack of interest in the course of study, a student
may develop the idea that thé work is too hard, that it is over his
head, and that, regardless of how much he might study, he would
inevitably fail. Here one may do much to overcome this feeling
o f inferiority by arranging for him to have a psychological exam
ination. It is reassuring to the student to know that he has a good
set o f mental tools with which to work, that the subject matter which
they are tackling is well within his grasp, and that failure is due
not to inferior intellectual equipment but to the way he happens to
be using his equipment.
Often emotional situations present obstacles to the child’s ability
to measure up to his group in school. Disturbed emotional attitudes
toward life are probably far more common as a cause for failure
than all other causes put together; and, although the situation may
appear relatively unimportant in the beginning, the conflict over

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the failure itself complicates the emotional attitude toward the
situation. Thus young people, who have never had an opportunity
to grow up and actually become independent, may meet fairly well
the situations to which they have been trained as a matter o f routine
but will find themselves totally at sea when it comes to utilizing
their time and ability without strict supervision. This, again, is
a matter o f training.
Parents, in their eagerness to contribute to the happiness o f their
children and to protect them from even the minor hardships o f life,
are frequently inclined to believe that their own experiences, their
own unhappiness and failures, can be utilized to save the child the
pangs o f humiliation that are brought about by failure and disap
pointment. They are always modifying the ordinary, everyday sit
uations so that their children can meet them without even for the
moment endangering their happiness. In other words, these parents
never allow the child to meet life and all its complex problems, as it
actually exists. They fail to appreciate that experience is the most
trustworthy weapon and that knowledge is the best armor for those
who are about to step out o f the home and battle with the world
at large.
A 14-year-old girl, CeoiUa, was causing botli her school principal and her
parents considerable concern, as they felt she was not doing work in keeping
with her intellectual equipment. There was also evidence that she was emo
tionally unstable. A t times ¡=she was given to outbursts o f temper, was inclined
to be impertinent to those in authority, and did not assume responsibility well.
It did not take long to determine the basis for this girl’s immature conduct.
She was extremely dependent upon her mother, and the demands which she
made upon her for things which she was perfectly capable of doing for herself
were astounding. An evidence of this immaturity was her insistence on being
allowed to sleep with her mother. This close, unhealthy relationship built
around mother and daughter was all-absorbing. It narrowed her interests
and practically eliminated friendships with other girls. Even when there were
girls of her own age available, Cecilia was likely to ignore them and seek the
companionship of grown-ups.
This immaturity and unpreparedness for life, although in evidence long
before adolescence, had been either overlooked or taken for granted by her
parents. It was only when Cecilia was confronted with some of the more
complicated social situations which naturally evolve in adolescence— when
some social contact with those of her own age became inevitable through
school activities— that her own discontent with her conduct led to general
dissatisfaction and unhappiness reflecting itself in her school work as well
as in her social behavior.
Dora was another girl whose parents had dominated her life, not by solicitude
in this case but by rigid rules and regulations. She was o f college age and
well endowed intellectually but had also been denied the divine privilege of
expressing her own personality. A t 18 she was without ideas o f her own and
182415 ° — 33— — 4

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without initiative. When called upon to assume obligations outside her home,
she was overwhelmed because of her inability to make decisions even about the
most trivial things. Notwithstanding the fact that she had a superior intel
lectual equipment, she was failing where those less fortunately endowed
intellectually, but better trained, were succeeding.

Over ambitious parents must also be mentioned as a factor in cre
ating emotional situations leading to school failures. In their desire
to have children succeed and excel in their school work, they are
likely to place too high a premium on marks and stress scholastic
attainment to the exclusion o f everything else. T o desire success for
one’s children is laudable, but to demand scholastic honors of the
child for the sake of gratifying personal pride is downright selfish.
The student himself may set his standard so high and become so
concerned in competing for high marks that he misses much of the
pleasure and satisfaction of school life. Friendships, athletics,
dramatics, and the general welfare o f the school are sometimes sac
rificed in this keen competition; and if he fails to attain success in
this scholastic striving, all is lost. This is an attitude that should
not be encouraged either by teachers or by parents. The following
case is an excellent example of how an ambitious father with very
dominant ideas created an emotional situation that worked out to
the disadvantage of a 16-year-old boy who was vigorous physically
and keen mentally and had a personality that should have carried
him a long way toward success.
Andrew had lost his mother very early in life and had been brought up by a
kindly, affectionate relative, who undoubtedly was a bit too much concerned
about his health, manners, and personal appearance. In spite of this, however,
he developed in a most satisfactory way. H is school work was a bit better than
the average, he excelled in athletics, enjoyed reading good books, and developed
as a sort of hobby his flair for writing a bit o f poetry.
Andrew’s father was very enthusiastic about his son’s athletic abilities and
spurred him on to greater activity in this particular field. W ith reference to
his literary interests, however, he was quite intolerant and left no stone
unturned to humiliate this boy about what he called his “ sissified ” indulgence.
H e finally had him transferred to a school where greater emphasis was put on
athletic ability; but instead of being stimulated to greater effort in baseball
and football, Andrew became more and more absorbed in his reading and
poetry.
A s might have been expected, his behavior antagonized the father and soon
caused a real gulf between the two. The boy became argumentative and later
resentful and defiant toward what he felt was unjust domination on the part
of his father. H e also complained that the latter no longer understood him.
The emotional state that was created in the boy by this antagonism toward
his father, however, dulled his enthusiasm for his school work and his athletic
activities, and even for his hobbies, and he had such a severe slump that he
was on the verge of flunking out o f school. It was necessary to have frequent
interviews with both the father and the son over a period of several weeks

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SOME EDUCATIONAL PITFALLS

before tbe former began to appreciate M s son’s needs, leaving him free to
build his life around his own personality rather than around his father’s
ambition.

These emotional conflicts of youth find their origin in many ob
scure experiences and situations to which the adolescent is subjected,
and they can be understood only when one takes time to know inti
mately the personality make-up o f the youth and the varied environ
mental situations which he has to combat. One must take into con
sideration the social, economic, and cultural conditions in which
he has been reared; the moral codes, religious creeds, racial back
ground o f his family, and the peculiarities and eccentricities o f the
members o f his family; what his parents demand of their children
in the way o f obligations and responsibilities, and what they permit
them in the way o f privileges. A ll these are of importance.
One must keep in mind that many of the individuals who fail to
make a place for themselves in either school or college meet the
more concrete and practical situations o f life successfully. Many
individuals who are not what is termed “ intellectual ” are very in
telligent; and life in its everyday contacts is met successfully only
with intelligence. The emotional conflicts which have been consid
ered may lead to behavior that brings the individual into conflict
not only with the family and society at large but with himself. These
behavior problems are invariably the result o f an environmental
situation due to a multiplicity of conditions and circumstances; and
the success o f parents and teachers in handling these problems de
pends upon their ability to understand how these complex situations
create emotional attitudes which affect the conduct o f the adolescent.

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THE QUESTION OF WORK
The normal adolescent must be expected to cause much trouble for himself
and others unless definite provision be made for what in primitive life he always
had— some control of his own living. (Hollingworth, Leta S. : The Psychology
of the Adolescent, pp. 93-94. D. Appleton & Co., New York, 1928.)

It is important to learn to work and to derive all the possible
benefits from experience with employment. A valuable opportunity
is thus provided for finding one’s self in relation to the rest o f the
working world, for becoming more independent, for learning more
about people and social conditions, for discovering one’s own voca
tional aptitudes and inclinations, and for finding a valid outlet for
surplus energies and emotions.
The part that work occupies in the life o f the average adolescent
varies widely. Each year thousands o f boys and girls leave school
at 14 or 15 to enter regular, gainful employment, while others look
forward to many more years o f education and training for future
usefulness.1 In rural districts the work of many young people ranges
all the way from doing chores on the family farm outside o f school
hours or during vacations to full-time employment in agriculture on
a commercial basis. In the cities the work o f adolescents may be
confined to cooperation in a few simple household duties, or it may
involve any o f the full-time or part-time jobs open to young people
in industry and commerce.
No matter how much emphasis is placed on the value o f work in
the process o f character training or how much stress is laid on
the undesirability o f heavy labor or long-sustained work for the
rapidly growing boy or girl, the fact remains that economic neces
sity compels some adolescents to work while economic independence
makes gainful employment entirely unnecessary for others. This
does not mean that all adolescents who leave school at an early age
to go to work do so because o f extreme economic need. Thé attitude
o f parents also is a determining factor in many cases. The number
o f young people employed fluctuates with business conditions and is
highest in times of prosperity when there would seem to be less
need for them to- contribute to the family support. Some parents
encourage their children to find jobs as soon as they reach the legal
lrFhe minimum-age provisions set up under the National Industrial Recovery Act,
through the President’s reemployment agreement, substitute agreements, and codes of
fair competition so far adopted establish 16 as a minimum age for employment of
minors in industry and business (at least during school hours), with a higher age
lim it for certain hazardous occupations. Unless extended, this w ill be temporary, as
, the legislation was enacted for a 2-year period.

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TH E QUESTION OF WORK

school-leaving age, because they are eager for the additional income
which the child’s earnings can provide, even though they may not
really need it. In other cases the child himself may insist on leaving
school to go to work either because he is dissatisfied with school or
because his parents have failed to develop in him the proper under
standing o f what education really is and are unable to cope with
his impatient desire for immediate independence.
Nevertheless, in many instances, economic necessity is an important
factor in determining whether or not the individual boy or girl seeks
a job. A contribution o f a few dollars a week may be so essential
to the income o f one family that a growing girl is obliged to spend
all her after-school and Saturday hours working in a store when
she really needs rest, fresh air, sunshine, and exercise to supply the
physical resistance and nervous energy she will need later in life.
On the other hand, a family which has never known financial need
may discourage a perfectly healthy and energetic boy from taking a
job that would provide an outlet for his energy and striving for in
dependence and would give him valuable training and experience.
In the girl’s case the loss o f earnings might make it impossible for
her to buy the necessary clothes and books and to provide the car fare
to enable her to attend high school. In the boy’s case, accepting an
after-school job as mail boy in an office or shelf boy in a library might
mean depriving some boy in real financial need of an opportunity to
earn money. To advise this girl to give up her job without making
some plan for a scholarship or attempting to arrange a part-time
school program for her would be as unreasonable as to advise that
the boy seek gainful employment when perhaps a volunteer job or
some other outlet would suit his needs better. Obviously each case
must be decided for itself.
It is for the purpose of deciding such questions as these that many
schools and colleges have provided vocational counselors and ad
visers or have made available the services o f expert visiting teachers
and vocational-guidance specialists or have established personnel
offices. For the answers to such questions may well affect the degree
of success with which the individual boy and girl make their future
adjustments. The majority o f adolescents, however, do not have
the benefit of expert services to aid in the adjustment of their prob
lems; but even if such assistance were more generally available, it
would still be necessary for parents and other adults in close con
tact with these young people to make every effort to understand all
the factors that are being considered. In any case it is of the utmost
importance that parents give earnest thought to the kind o f work
which their children undertake. Obviously, all types o f work are
not equally suitable, and some are distinctly harmful. A newspaper

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route may provide a certain amount of business training and develop
habits o f regularity, while a job as newsboy selling papers on a
crowded street or late at night cannot be recommended. Taking
subscriptions for reputable magazines may be a relatively pleasant
way o f earning a few extra dollars, even though it may not provide
much training; but when selling on commission involves teaching
boys and girls and even very young children to tell pathetic stories
in order to dispose of their wares, it is an occupation in which no
right-minded parent would want to see children engaged.
Aside entirely from the question o f economic pressure, a certain
amount o f work is desirable in the adolescent’s program. Not only
does work o f the right type and right amount encourage habits of
industry and develop responsibility, but it gives the individual a
sense of his place in the scheme of things. Father works to supply
the income which supports the family. Mother works to make a
home for father and the children. It is no more than fair to let
children share in this scheme and feel themselves active participants
in the producing as well as the consuming aspects of family life.
I f children have been accustomed from an early age to assume
responsibility for a few simple but definite household tasks, in keep
ing with their years and skill, they will be better able and more
willing to undertake more difficult and useful work later on.
There is much talk about the value o f work in character training,
and yet the fact is often overlooked that the simplest household tasks
offer excellent opportunities for just such training. I f Don under
stands that it is his job and his alone to clean the family automobile,
that he has assumed the responsibility of cleaning it well and is
under obligation to finish, his job on time, if his family expresses
pleasure in the result and satisfaction in being able to depend upon
him, he will take pride in his task and consider it worth doing well.
But this will not be true if father stands on the back porch watching
every step with a critical eye or exclaiming in impatience over the
length o f time it takes the boy.
I f Kuth realizes that everything from planning to serving the
meal is her responsibility, that she is relieving mother of a real share
o f her own household obligations, and that her efforts are appre
ciated by her family, she, too, will take pride, satisfaction, and
pleasure in performing this task as well as possible. Children may
have to be trained to do a special jo b ; but once they are trained, they
should be put “ on their own.” Much of our satisfaction in work
comes from the feeling that it has been our task to do and we have
done it to the best of our ability. I f there are certain duties-for
which a child seems temperamentally unsuited—if, for instance, a
boy’s phlegmatic ways make an endless performance of mowing the
lawn— family peace and comfort may necessitate transferring him to

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TH E QUESTION OF WORK

some other activity, and yet training in persistent application to the
task in hand may be the very best thing for such an adolescent.
There is also much in the old Tom Sawyer stunt o f having such
a good time painting the fence that everyone begs for a chance to
help. Parents who themselves make drudgery of their work cannot
expect their children to feel inspired to help them.
The examples mentioned should not suggest that household activi
ties need be limited to the girls. Ned’s mother says that she would
be quite unable to keep up with her work and still have time for
a little recreation were it not that her two oldest boys— 12 and 9
years o f age—make their beds, clean their own rooms, and dry dishes
for her. This training will prove equally helpful to the boys, not
only because they will have acquired a certain proficiency in a few
household duties, but also because they will have learned to assume
responsibility for even minor obligations in everyday life and to
share family burdens.
I f work at home has value in giving young people a sense of
sharing in the productive aspects of family life, work outside the
home gives them a clearer conception o f the employer-employee re
lationship. A t home, if Donald wants to go to the ball game, prob
ably his chores can be postponed or done by some other member of
the family. I f Ruth is going to a party, her mother may excuse
her from washing the dishes after the evening meal. Or, if parents
insist that the work be done as usual, Donald and Ruth may say
that mother and dad are “ mean ” and “ hard ” and that they even
deprive their own children o f a good time. Outside the home Donald
and Ruth realize that the newspapers must be delivered promptly
regardless of ball games and the library must have its attendant
regardless o f parties. They may feel aggrieved that this is so, but
they learn to expect little mercy from the powers that be in the news
paper business or the public library, and console themselves with the
philosophical reflection that f life is like that.”
At home, when father and mother request that things be done in
a certain way— for example, that the paint brushes be left in tur
pentine after being used, or that the kitchen towels be rinsed out
after each meal Donald and Ruth may feel that their parents are
fussy and set in their ways. They may become irritable, sulky, or
resentful when reminded to do things; and if their parents also feel
annoyed and irritated at constantly having to point out these over
sights, the home atmosphere becomes somewhat unpleasant, and the
bonds of sympathy between parents and children are heavily taxed.
Outside the home Donald may consider Mr. Cash-and-Carry an old
grouch for insisting that groceries must be displayed in his own
particular way, and Ruth may wish that her customers could be
obliged to return to the racks the dresses they have tried on but not

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GUIDING TH E ADOLESCENT

purchased; but they are likely to accept their trials as the inevitable
hardships o f work instead of regarding them as personal afflictions.
I f work at home has the advantage o f providing the adolescent
with an opportunity for sharing the business o f maintaining family
life, work outside the home should give him an opportunity for feel
ing himself a unit in the larger working world. This is important,
for it is during adolescence that the individual is likely to feel most
uncertain as to where he really fits in. He needs the security of
family life, and yet he wants to escape from i t ; he needs to feel that
he has a place o f his own in the world, and at the same time he wants
to feel free to explore all kinds o f other places. Having a job—an
after-school or a Saturday job or a summer-vacation job—provides
him with at least a slight degree of the feeling o f confidence and
security, the assurance of having at least some place he can fill which
he so much needs, and yet, at the same time, it provides him with an
opportunity for exploring life outside the home.
It is in work outside the home that a young person begins to see
his own identity emerge. He is no longer a mere member o f a fam
ily ; in fact his employer and fellow employees may not know a thing
about his family. He stands and falls by his own ability and by his
own accomplishments. He is paid quite impersonally, on a purely
commercial basis. He begins to enjoy the relative economic inde
pendence which his earnings may give him, and with this comes a
gratifying sense of independence in general. Through his work he
begins to gain a new understanding of human nature and to learn to
know people as congenial or cantankerous to work for. The prin
ciples o f honesty and generosity which his parents or his Sundayschool teacher may have taught him take on a new meaning when he
sees them practiced in his own contacts and experience with people.
Clearly, the choice of a job for the adolescent, even a temporary,
part-time job, should not be left to chance i f the boy or the girl is to
be benefited by the experience as a wage earner. Such jobs should
also be considered as providing material for vocational guidance.
Employment as office boy in a lawyer’s office may settle once and for
all John’s question as to whether or not he really wants to study law.
Saturdays spent doing odd jobs around father’s place o f business may
help to determine for both father and son whether or not this boy is
a good candidate for a future junior partnership. Two hours a day
spent in caring for Mrs. Jones’ preschool children may convince
Sarah that she has neither the patience nor the imagination to enjoy
kindergarten work. W ork in a bookstore may reveal to another girl
that her real interest is not in the books but in the people who read
them and that she probably wants to get into some kind o f social
work.

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TH E QUESTION OF WORK

Work during adolescence under proper conditions is a mean§ of
keeping young boys and girls wholesomely occupied, helping them
to use up some o f the abundant energy that is constantly seeking an
outlet, and teaching them that work itself is an excellent antidote for
all kinds o f dissatisfactions, sorrows, and tribulations.
It must always be kept in mind, however, that boys and girls in
their teens are still growing and that the growing process uses up
some of their reserve energy. The human machine is not always
adjusted to its maximum efficiency during adolescence, and it may
sometimes be wiser to keep a growing boy or girl off the job entirely
for a summer or discourage his doing more than his required school
work for a year if he is not up to par. Parents often fail to under
stand the problems o f their children. Clinton’s father speaks sar
castically about his big strapping 15-year old who lounges around
the house, too lazy to do anything and too awkward, when he does
try to do anything, to do it well. Stanley’s mother is somewhat more
sympathetic and also more observant when she remarks, “ You can
tell that Stanley is growing; he lolls about and seems not to have
strength enough to move a muscle. Then all of a sudden he will
have a spurt of energy that will send him off to play tennis for 3
hours at a stretch in the glaring sun, and nothing can stop him.”
This lack o f capacity for long-sustained physical effort is one of
the real arguments against the employment o f immature boys and
girls in jobs in which such effort is required of them. The wise
parent will not want to seek character development for his children
at the expense o f their physical welfare. To combine school life and
some daily job requires planning if the child’s time for home study,
play, and exercise is not to be lost or unduly curtailed and i f he is
not to lose needed hours o f sleep, thus jeopardizing success in school
or health. A daily job should not be too taxing nor continue too
many hours. Saturday jobs, in many cases, would be better.
It is important to learn to work, but it is equally important for
youth to learn to play and to derive all the benefits possible from
experiences with the wise use of leisure. Indeed, in the present stage
of our social progress, in this machine age, training for leisure has
assumed new importance. Those who grow up unable to use leisure
without breaking the law, unable to seek pleasure in any but for
bidden pastimes, unable to find enjoyment without expending large
sums of money, or, perhaps, unable to play under any circumstances,
present just as much o f a social problem as those who never learn
to work.

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This stupid experiment of organizing work and failing to organize play has,
of course, brought about a fine revenge. The love of pleasure will not be denied,
and when it has turned into all sorts of malignant and vicious appetites, then
we, the middle-aged, grow quite distracted and resort to all kinds of restrictive
measures. (Addams, Jane; The Spirit of Youth and the City Streets, p. 6.
Macmillan Co., New York, 1909.)

PRESENT COMPLAINTS

The idea that “ nowadays” young people do not know how to
make intelligent use of their leisure time is constantly dinned into
our ears. Anxious parents, harassed school principals, earnest col
lege deans, zealous preachers, eager recreation leaders, each in his
own particular way tries to exhort, persuade, adjure, encourage, or
shame adolescents into spending their leisure hours more properly
and profitably. Occasionally the quiet voice of some judicious man
or woman may be heard to say that young people are as fine today
as they ever were; that the spirit of youth, which is cherished and
envied, has always sought expression in play; and that those who
object to the way the young people play had better look to the op
portunities that are provided before they criticize the use they make
o f their opportunities.
Occasionally some man or women who has spent a lifetime work
ing with boys and girls, watching them at work and in their recrea
tion, and helping them through their troubles, will point out the
courage, generosity, seriousness, unselfishness, and readiness to take
responsibility that lie beneath the surface o f the painted lips and
cigarette smoke about which other adults are busy complaining.
But such men and women are rare, and their words offer little com
fort to the adults who are more concerned with what Mary and
John actually do than with the potential courage, unselfishness,
seriousness, and generosity that may exist beneath the surface.
What are some of the complaints that are made against the mod
ern adolescent’s use o f leisure time ?
First there are the complaints about leisure time spent at home:
Tom is always on the go * * *• Grace comes home just long
enough to change her clothes and go out again * * *. When
they do stay home they don’t know what to do with themselves, and
they hang around until one almost wishes they would go out
52

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LEARNING TO USE LEISURE

again * * *. They always tune in for the loud, snappy music
without the slightest regard for the tastes of the rest o f the family,
and they appropriate dad’s favorite chair and make a mess of the
evening paper * * *. When they bring in their friends, mother
and dad can stay in the kitchen * * *
Now let us see some of the complaints about spending leisure time
away from home: When John goes out, the family car goes with
him and mother and dad may either walk or stay at home * * *
Jane must see every motion picture and some of them more than
once * * *. There’s no use trying to suggest the time for coming
home; both boys and girls are always late, and they always have
some alibi there was a flat tire, or the party lasted until 2 ,*or some
one had to be driven to the other end of town, or nobody realized
how late it was getting to be * * *. Ruth has been forbidden
^
^
E®* night club], but the rest o f the crowd were going
and, o f course, she couldn’t come home alone * * *. W e’ve talked
again and again with the children about the dangers of parking
along the roadside and the cheapening effect of petting; but we don’t
know what they are up to when they are away, and you can’t get a
word out o f them when they get back.
But perhaps most puzzling o f all is the fact that young people
nowadays don’t seem to enjoy the things that young people used to
enJoy; they don’t stay at home and pop corn or pull taffy; they don’t
gather around the piano and sing folk songs; they don’t look for
ward to the church sleigh-ride parties and box suppers in winter
and the ice-cream socials and Sunday-school picnics in summer; they
don t take dignified Sunday-afternoon strolls through the park or
go rowing with pretty parasols to protect them from the sun; they
d on t play daintily at croquet or lawn tennis; they don’t care for
parties in a gymnasium or auditorium with' crepe-paper decorations.
In general, they want to go “ tearing around ” , and they prefer the
entertainment offered by commercial places o f amusement to any
thing they might provide for themselves.
But after all, the adolescents o f today are merely accepting life
as hey find it when they make use o f commercial amusements. They
are not responsible for the opening of motion-picture theaters; they
neither invented nor purchased the first automobiles; they are not
running the dine and dance restaurants nor the roadhouses. I f as
parents, we object to our own adolescents spending their leisure
unmtelligently, why don’t we train them to find enjoyment in ac
tivities which we consider more worth while? If, as public-spirited
citizens, we object to the exploitation o f youth which is practiced
on adolescents in general by the worst o f commercialized recreation,

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why don’t we clean up our communities and promote the develop
ment o f adequate and wholesome public recreational facilities?
There is another point to be made in defense of the modern
adolescent’s use of leisure; namely, that his parents probably do
not use their leisure to much better advantage. They may not
go to public dance halls, but, like their young sons and daughters,
they probably go to the movies. They may not drive at the rate
of 60 miles an hour or park along the roadside, but they, too, regard
driving as a form of entertainment. Perhaps they spend their
leisure time in rocking chairs on the porch or sitting in front of
the radio with the newspaper, or gossiping about neighbors and
relatives—none o f which activities would have much appeal for the
youngster brimming over with vitality and energy.
One o f the significant things periods of unemployment have
taught us is that many o f us adults are pitifully at a loss to know
what to do with ourselves when we have ample spare time and little
money. As full-time jobs have become part-time jobs and 4 men’s
work has dwindled to work for 1 man, as vacations without pay
have increased in number, and formerly busy professional people
have begun to find themselves with more and more free time at
their disposal, it has been obvious that our emphasis in training and
guidance has been on learning to work rather than on learning to
play. We have had vocational guidance but no recreational guid
ance, and at the moment it looks as if some such aid were very much
needed.
Mrs. White complains that her husband mopes around the house
day after day. I f he would only go down to the beach or take the
little ones to the zoo, or do some carpentering, or prepare for some
better job by going to night school or taking a correspondence
course; but he just sits around, dozing or reading detective stories
and getting crosser every day. Mrs. Brown complains that her hus
band wanders the streets all day long. I f he would only spend some
o f his time giving her a lift with the housework so that she wouldn t
get so worn out and tired, things would be easier for both of them,
and she wouldn’t get cross when he got the blues over his unemploy
ment.
Mrs. White and Mrs. Brown forget that their husbands have been
working so hard and so long that they don’t know what to do when
they’re not working; they have not learned to relax, and they have
not learned to plan their own time. They are used to having the
demands o f their job and physical fatigue determine what their
activities should be.
It is likely, too, that they, like many o f the rest o f us, do not quite
appreciate the meaning of leisure. The dictionaries define leisure

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LEARNING TO USE LEISURE

rather simply as freedom from occupation or employment, but ac
tually there is more to it. Leisure for most o f us is freedom that
has been earned. Those of us who have been brought up to spend
our days working can look forward with pleasure to a summer vaca
tion o f 2 or more weeks, or to a Christmas holiday, or to a long week
end in spring. We can enjoy the free time with a pleasurable feel
ing o f having earned the right to sleep late, to sit in the sun, to read
in the middle o f the morning, to play when we would otherwise be
working, or even to plunge energetically into serious preoccupation
with the garden, painting the screens, sewing, canning, studying,
practicing music, rearranging the furniture, or whatever else the
spirit may move us to do. But the moment we are oppressed by a
feeling o f unpleasant compulsion—when someone begins to fuss and
nag and bring pressure to bear, or when our own unreasonable con
science acts as the compelling agent—the element o f leisure disap
pears; and should our vacation continue indefinitely, all these activi
ties would begin to pall because they would no longer be things that
could be done only on special occasions. On the contrary, they could
be done any day, and so no day might seem exactly the right one.
A period o f unemployment must be recognized as fundamentally
different from a vacation. One can neither settle down to relaxation
and enjoyment o f leisure that has been satisfyingly earned, nor
rest easy in the security that a job and a means o f earning a
living and more leisure are waiting at the other end of the 2 weeks.
I f it is difficult to help the average citizen to learn to play after
working hours, it is more difficult to help him to play when he has
no work.
It is probably true that many Europeans get far more enjoyment
out o f small incomes than most Americans do even in times o f
prosperity. Old or young, in summer or winter, they can put a loaf
o f bread and a piece o f cheese or sausage in a haversack, and with
a camera at their side they start out as fourth-class passengers on
steamer, train, or tram, and they will probably do a good stint
on foot. They have no care for what others may think of them,
and they are happy.
That ability to play should be cultivated as a valuable asset for
what it would add not only to the individual’s ability to enjoy
leisure and life in general, but also to his mental health and his
ability to adjust to all sorts of situations, even that of unemployment.

EDUCATION IN THE USE OF LEISURE

'jpt

Although leisure is a term that scarcely seems applicable before
adolescence, education in the use of leisure begins long before. It
begins when father and mother first set aside a Sunday or a holi-

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day for an expedition to the zoo or a picnic in the woods, and the
children dimly realize that this outing is considered sufficiently
entertaining and worth while for their parents to be willing to
devote some o f their precious leisure time to it. The child who
never has such an experience and, on the contrary, comes to realize
that his father prefers to spend all his leisure away from home and
that his mother considers it impossible to have a good time with the
family, is not likely to plan to have his own good time within the
family circle. Many fathers and mothers would like to have good
times with their children but somehow never do. Some o f them
think they cannot afford the expense involved; some of them think
they have not sufficient time; some o f them find children too nerveracking; some o f them do not know what in the world to do with
children; and some o f them are always intending to do something
but never get around to it. The fathers often think this should
be mother’s job, and the mothers may think they spend enough time
with the children day by day without planning special outings.
But raising children is a 2 -parent job ; and if training in the wise
use of leisure is to be a part of child rearing, this, too, is a 2 -parent
job. Even busy people can plan to set aside a few hours a week
for things they really want to do, and it would be just as easy
to plan for a little time for activities with the family. Lack of
money is not a major obstacle to family good times. As for inter
esting things to do, the following suggestions may offer some help
to parents groping in the dark.
Beginning when the children are still quite small, short trips to
the parks can be made great occasions. There are colorful flower
gardens to be seen and fascinating fountains; the zoo must be visited
and the aquarium; and possibly there is a chance for a boat ride
on a pond or a lagoon. Then there is the seashore or lake shore
or river or pond—where a tradition o f family bathing parties and
picnic suppers can be started at an early age and continued until
the children are quite grown up. I f the baby is too small to go
along and nobody can be found to look after him, let father and
mother take turns going out with the children for that particular
year. Family habits are established as definitely as individual
habits; and if the family once gets into the habit of always letting
the baby stand in the way of family companionship, there will be
some other excuse when the baby gets older. In winter there are
museums to visit, and on special occasions a brief and carefully
planned trip to a large department store might be made.
Riding to the “ end of the line ” has a great attraction for many
children. Even a busy father can sometimes be induced to take his
boys for a trolley car or “ elevated ” ride for an hour or two on a

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Sunday morning between Sunday school and dinner time. This
has the advantage of satisfying the child’s curiosity as to “ where the
car goes ” and enabling him to see something o f the city, and at
the same time giving his mother a bit of respite at the time when
it is often most needed.
As the children’s curiosity about everyday living increases, father
can take them to visit a local fire station, or arrange to have them
see the inside o f a railroad locomotive. I f they are near a harbor, he
can take them down to see boats come in and out and load or unload;
perhaps they can arrange to see the engine room, or perhaps there
are dry docks where boat building may be seen at first hand. I f they
live near a Coast Guard station, they may see a lighthouse and life
boats; if they are near an airport or a landing field, they can go
down to see airplanes at close range.
Watching how things are made is so fascinating a pastime to
adults that almost every large construction project has its audience
o f interested and critical adults explaining to one another what is
going on and expressing admiration o f the work or doubts as to the
feasibility o f the plan. I f this is interesting to adults, it is even
more worth while to the children, particularly if father is able to
explain how things work and what the outcome will be. Excava
tions for buildings, dredging, road and bridge construction, stone
quarrying, projects for raising or moving a building from its foun
dation, steel construction work—all these will provide profitable
and yet inexpensive entertainment for short periods of leisure.
Visits may be made to a large market, a local newspaper press, a
sawmill, a large bakery, a dairy, an ice-cream factory, and similar
local industries. Sometimes it is possible for a group of parents
to get together and plan to take turns taking their children on such
expeditions. This may add to the fun for the children and may help
the individual parent to enter into the thing with more confidence
and enthusiasm.
City families do well to make trips to the country to provide their
children with opportunities for some first-hand observations o f
horses, pigs, cows, and chickens. Most city children consider it a
rare treat to be allowed to gather eggs, watch the milking, see a
windmill in operation, work a pump, and pick fruits and vegetables
as they grow.
Families living in the country can offer their children an equally
profitable opportunity by arranging for a day in the city, where even
the sidewalks, with their limitless opportunities for roller skating,
are an exciting, new experience.
Then there are the places o f historical interest to be visited; an
old fort, battle scenes, monuments, birthplaces o f famous people,

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Indian mounds, the State capitol, and the historical society. Some
communities are far richer than others in such resources; and yet
in the most unexpected places one may happen upon a real, oldfashioned blacksmith shop with a ringing anvil, or a primitive mill,
which may have interesting associations in addition to being good
examples o f how the world’s work was done in days gone by.
There still remain innumerable special things, such as the flower
show, the pet show, the automobile show, the sportsmen’s show, the
State and county fairs, and all kinds o f exhibits. As the individual
interests and talents o f the children develop, parents will also doubt
less wish to foster an appreciative interest in art and music by taking
them to concerts and to art galleries.
Most o f the things mentioned so far have been things to see rather
than things to do, and it may be argued that there is little value for
the future in training children to go around looking at things. Even
though this objection may be met with the answer that the children
are learning to find a satisfying interest in the real activities o f life
rather than in made-to-order entertainment, it is nevertheless de
sirable to introduce into a program for leisure time some activities
in which they can participate.
Here again parents must take thought early if they look forward
to seeing their adolescents enjoying leisure hours at home and in the
family. I f the children want to play grocery store in the family
pantry, shoe store in the family bedrooms, or barber shop in the
bathroom; if they want to get out old clothes and “ dress up ” ; if
they want to rearrange the furniture in order to play “ train ” , or
church, or school; if they want to have a tea party on the porch or
make a hut in the backyard, what do we do about it? Do we give
them a dime and tell them to run along and not bother us? D o we
tell them that we can’t have them all over the house and send them
out to play in May’s yard or on the school playground, or to someone
else’s house? Do we tell them to stay in their own playroom where
they belong with their own toys ?
I f Tommy invites us to hear him preach his first sermon from a
high-chair pulpit, or Helen tries to sell us tickets to the greatest
backyard circus in the world, or Peter wishes us to attend the special
performance o f the junior dramatic society, are we too busy to go?
O f course we cannot be at the constant beck and call of young
sters at play, and we certainly cannot have them carrying our shoes
and groceries all over the house or playing with father s shaving
brush. But children are quick to learn the rules of any game, and
they will play fair if they are well taught. There can be rules about
which shoes to use and how not to play with them just as there are
rules about checkers; there can be days when the chairs cannot

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be made into trains just as there are days when the roller skates are
not to be taken out. And as for putting things back where they
were found and straightening up afterward—that is a vital part
o f the philosophy o f family living; pajamas are hung up in the
morning and soiled clothes put with the laundry; the bathroom is
left neat and clean for the next person; and toys that have been
taken out are put away when the play hour is over. These things
become established customs,. and there is no more need for a dis
ordered house or cross words and harassed looks in relation to
habits o f play than there would be in relation to habits o f eating,
sleeping, or the toilet.
ADOLESCENTS AT LEISURE

No matter how pleasant the family life and how much the children
enjoy their leisure-time activities with their parents, the normal
adolescent, as he grows older, will want to spend more and more
time doing things with the boys and girls of his own age and less
with his family. This is something to be faced as a fact, and
something which parents should be prepared to welcome as a sign
that their growing son and daughter are developing in an entirely
normal way and making a good adjustment to life. Instead of
making all the plans themselves and participating in the activities
with their children, parents will now gradually withdraw. The
club and the group logically become more important than the family
in leisure time. There may still be special occasions when a party
with the family and their relatives will be greatly enjoyed, but even
on such occasions the adolescent is likely to look around for some
other young person of his own age with whom he can remain a little
aloof from both grown-ups and children.
The adolescent may continue to enjoy many o f the interests stimu
lated and cultivated at home; but instead of 44 playing show ” with
the neighborhood youngsters, he will want to join a junior dramatic
club. He will wish to substitute class picnics and Scout hikes for
some o f the family picnics and walks. Practice with the school
band or school orchestra and a real conductor will take precedence
over practice at home. In fact, in everything from straight athletics
to social dancing the adolescent boy and girl are likely to seek com
panionship in their own age group. They are beginning to be aware
o f themselves as individuals and to realize that although they must
be part o f the family group, they must also be themselves. More
over, they suspect that they can be themselves more effectively in
solitude or in the company o f other adolescents than in the presence
o f a domineering, inquisitive, and critical family. O f course, even
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nice families sometimes seem domineering, inquisitive, and critical
when one is just beginning to grow up.
There may be a rule— or perhaps a tactful understanding— about
the hour for coming home, and parents should certainly know where
and with whom their adolescents are spending their time. But they
will do well to limit their inquiries as well as their criticisms and
corrections to important issues, leaving as many minor decisions as
possible in the hands of the adolescents themselves in the hope that
their past training and maturing judgment will ultimately win the
day.
This is a difficult role for many parents to assume, particularly if
they have been counting on more rather than less companionship
at this time. Fathers find it hard if they have constantly postponed
the day when they would Mget acquainted ” with their sons, or if
they have been looking forward to adolescence as the time when they
would begin to make a “ pal ” o f the oldest boy. Mothers find it
hard i f they have been hoping to relive the experiences o f youth
through keeping in close touch with their daughters. But unless
they face the situation and the needs of their children frankly, and
refrain from becoming dependent on them for entertainment and
companionship, they must either meet with constant disappointment
or gratify their ambitions at a sacrifice of the normal development
of their children.
A pathetic example of the folly o f counting on one’s children may be seen
in Mr. B, a kindly, middle-aged father who is completely wrapped up in his
young son and hurries home day after day in the hope that this 18-year-old boy
will go for a walk or play a game o f golf with him. This boy is neither
abnormally selfish nor lacking in affection for his fa th er; but having a normal
interest in the activities of his friends and fellow classmates, he becomes
engrossed in pursuits with them and feels no responsibility toward entertaining
his father, who patiently allows himself to be disappointed and hurt again and
again.

Another example is I saber s mother, a young woman who was not satisfied
with having lived through her own youth but wanted also to live through the
experiences of her daughter. A s the latter found herself growing up with
tastes and interests o f her own which she wished to develop independently of
her mother’s dominating influence, she withdrew into a shell of privacy which
her mother could not enter.

It is in our leisure time that we can be most freely and frankly
ourselves, for when we are truly at leisure, we may exercise a choice
in our activities. During adolescence more than at any other time,
the individual needs the opportunity to exercise this choice, for one
of his main objectives is to be himself—to find himself, to reveal his
own identity as distinguished from that o f his family. I f his parents
are always wishing to determine his activities or seeking to enjoy

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them with him or even for him, his efforts to find himself are frustrated. The mother who bubbles over with enthusiasm over her
daughter s parties and the father who gets his “ biggest kick ” out
o f his son’s touchdown must be careful lest in their mature enjoy
ment and excitement they seem to make their daughter’s parties
their own parties, and their son’s touchdowns their own touchdowns
leaving the adolescents with nothing for themselves.
Thus the adolescent’s need to share experiences with those o f his
own age, to become independent o f his parents and lead his own life,
and to protect the evolution o f his own personality and individuality
seems to require that parents expect less and less companionship
and make fewer demands as the children grow older. Education
in the use o f leisure must be given in childhood. Adolescence is the
time when companionship and confidence may be sought by the child
or invited by the parent, but it is too late for the parent to force it.

w
M

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ASOCIAL CONDUCT
Thus in the twentieth century youth appears to be in conflict with the
standards o f behavior in home, school, church, and community. (Van W aters,
M iriam : Adolescence. Encyclopedia of Social Sciences, vol. 1, pp. 458-459.)

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It *

In any discussion with parents o f the subject o f delinquency, it
is important first of all to stress the fact that the subject under con
sideration is not the confirmed delinquent who has been a more or less
constant offender against law and order for a period o f years and
who has had court records and commitments to institutions. Our
concern is rather with that fairly large group o f young people who
for some reason or other, in their endeavor to get out o f life that
something in the way o f personal satisfaction for which everyone
is striving, have introduced into their scheme o f living tendencies o f
a delinquent nature, which, if continued, will eventually bring them
into conflict with society.
In dealing with human behavior, whether good or bad, it is essen
tial to appreciate and understand that conduct is always motivated
by some inner force. Some environmental factor may be the precipi
tating cause, but it is the state of mind that determines whether
or not trivial and inconsequential events will result in conduct o f a
disrupting character. The purpose o f this section is to indicate in
a general way the soil in which delinquent careers are most likely
to develop and the particular situations in life that are most likely
to act as the spurts which frequently result in disastrous explosions.
It has been pointed out by those interested in juvenile delinquency
that chronic offenders usually started on their delinquent careers
before reaching the age o f adolescence. Probably one half of these
offenders came from families that had histories o f much asocial
activity. Many o f these chronic offenders came from homes which
were badly disorganized, often to an extent which led the children
to leave home at an early age. In considering the soil in which
delinquency is likely to develop, it is often found, therefore, that it
has been well fertilized with poverty and vice and also by mental
and physical inadequacies. This does not mean, o f course, that all
delinquents spring from such unhappy and inadequate backgrounds.
Delinquency may be a problem even in the best-regulated families.
The background is but one of the factors that need consideration
in the effort to understand conduct. It is obvious, however, that
children reared in such an environment would not be likely to ac-

ASOCIAL CONDUCT

quire the essential habits and personality traits to permit them to
meet life in an adequate way during that adolescent period when
things matter so much and when experience is so limited.
Besides the family background o f the child, one must also consider
certain inadequacies and handicaps o f the child himself which
would tend to make for difficulties in meeting the ordinary demands o f life. Illness, mental inadequacy, physical handicaps—
such as defects of hearing and vision, residuals o f infantile paraly
sis, a chronic heart condition, and the like— are all particular ob
stacles which certain individuals have to overcome before they can
ht into the social scheme o f things successfully. These must be
considered carefully in any effort to understand both the contribut
ing and the precipitating factors leading to asocial activity.
,
tile meth°d by which these early delinquent trends are
handled, rather than the trends themselves, however, that determine
whether or not they are eradicated or perpetuated. Relatively few
c lldren reach the age o f adolescence without having had some ex
periences that were very definitely o f a delinquent type. These
isolated, temporary deviations from the straight and narrow path
need not be regarded as occasion for alarm, and yet they require
wise .handling if they are not to be repeated.
There is no one well-defined technique that will work out to the
best advantage in all situations. Nor is there any one method of
insuring success. The economic situation o f the parents is o f con
siderable importance, but neither poverty nor affluence is a determinlng factor with reference to managing a delinquent wisely. I t may
be that the son o f the affluent parent will be fortunate enough to
escape a type o f treatment that would be likely to perpetuate, rather
than correct, his delinquency. On the other hand, unwise protection
may be thrown about him so that he never has to suffer the con
sequences o f his own acts until they reach such magnitude that society
itself intervenes and demands that he pay. In the general manage
ment o f the delinquent cases that come to the attention o f the public
too much stress is often given to the family’s financial or social
standing, many a delinquent being dealt with harshly because o f the
unsavory reputation o f the family; while, on the other hand, family
prestige may cause social and political pressure to be brought to

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A tendency that leads distinctly away from the wise handling o f
undesirable conduct but that is nevertheless common among many
parents is an unwillingness to face fairly and squarely a situation
as it actually exists. This leads to the use o f artificially produced
excuses. Mary’s mother explains that her daughter would not haye

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stayed out late at night and played about with undesirable company
if she had not been led astray by her friend who was older and
wiser. Tom’s father complains in indignation that the school
teacher who expelled his son for cheating had never given the boy
a fair deal. Another father attempts to protect his son who has
been apprehended for taking an automobile by explaining that it was
a boyish prank and that the youngsters had just been out for a lark.
A very solicitous mother finds an excuse for the truancy and mild
indiscretions o f her 13-year-old boy in the fact that he had always
been ill and had never had a good time.
It is quite natural for the youth in trouble to accept as a means
o f protecting himself from criticism these excuses which the selfdeceived parent offers; and although he may not accept them as the
true reasons for his misdeeds, he nevertheless appreciates that they
serve the purpose o f letting him off without punishment or repri
mand. Notwithstanding that there is a constant and progressive
innate tendency leading toward the socialization o f the individual,
and that asocial activity can be looked upon, in a general way, as
self-eliminating, this is not likely to work out in the individual case
unless the youth is permitted to learn from his own experiences that
his asocial activity does not pay. If, on the contrary, he finds in his
delinquencies ways and means o f overcoming all the difficulties and
hardships in life and o f acquiring those things which, for the moment
at least, bring pleasure and satisfaction without having to meet the
responsibilities that actually attach themselves to such conduct, it is
but to be expected that asocial trends will continue.
It must be kept in mind, however, that it is the motive behind the
conduct rather than the conduct itself which really matters, and the
motives are not always evident upon superficial examination. One
o f the fundamental and best-known principles o f modern psychology
is that much conduct, social or asocial, is dominated by motives that
lie below the level o f consciousness. Conduct is but a striving toward
emotional satisfactions—a certain release of energy which, if pent up,
leads to tension and a general feeling o f discomfort and which can
be released only by activity, either physical or mental. There may
be several ways o f attaining emotional satisfaction through activity.
One boy may satisfy his sense o f power through bullying, while an
other would attain the same satisfaction through protecting. It
happens that one way is looked upon as being asocial and undesirable
and is frowned upon by the group, while the other is approved and
applauded.' We, therefore, try to eradicate one method and perpetu
ate the other.
In brief, the effort to eradicate delinquent and asocial trends must
include a plan whereby the emotional strivings of the individual will
be satisfied in a way that is compatible with the social standards o f

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the group in which he is living. This training and the accompany
ing experience are among the most important acquisitions of ado
lescence. With many o f the adolescents it is not difficult to interpret
the problems o f their age in terms of their inadequate preparation
for it. The intensity o f their emotions plus the limitations of their
experience makes this particular phase o f life more trying than any
other, and all too frequently the habits and personality traits which
were fairly adequate in the protected environment of the home lead
nothing but failure o f the most pathetic sort when the child is
called upon to meet the broader issues of life.

STEALING

The following story o f 12-year-old Neal, who had gotten into rather
severe difficulties on account o f stealing, is a good example o f how
involved the underlying motives may be in what appears to be a
very simple, commonplace situation. This lad’s difficulties began
during his preschool years and were due, in part at least, to the fact
that he had never been taught by his parents to differentiate between
what was his own and what belonged to others. The fact that he
took pennies and food from home and toys from other children made
little impression upon his parents and at that time was overlooked
because o f his immature age. It was also overlooked, or at least
given little attention, that he was not well trained in the fundamental
habits o f life—eating, sleeping, and elimination; that he did not get
along well with other children, never entering into competition with
them and invariably seeking companions who were younger; and
that even at an early age he resorted to masturbation when out of
harmony with his environment. Later on the movies and mystery
stories were his chief retreats from the realities o f life.

A s Neal advanced in years, he broadened his field o f activities so far as
stealing was concerned. H e went from the home to his playm ates; later on,
to stores; and finally he developed and carried out well-laid plans to enter the
homes in the neighborhood, taking money in the form of petty cash from pocketbooks, toy savings banks, and so forth. I t was while on one of these pilfering
escapades that he was apprehended. H e admitted a long series o f delinquencies
to his m other; and after a family conference, he was given a series o f daily
lectures by his father, meanwhile being completely ostracized from his family
and having all his meals in his room. The boy was completely bewildered
and confused, as well as frightened, by this method of punishment; and
although both parents unflinchingly carried out the measures which they
thought were best suited to eradicate the “ criminal tendencies ” in their son,
they were depressed and discouraged.
This father
great pride in
reproach. H e
upon business

was a hard-working, fairly successful business man, who took
his honesty and let it be known that his integrity was beyond
was a man without interests or friends and entirely dependent
for any satisfactions in life. The mother was a high-strung

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nervous, unstable individual who always spoke in superlatives and was
primarily concerned about how things would affect her.
She was much
more concerned about protecting the reputation of the family than in under
standing the circumstances and conditions leading up to the difficulties with her
son.
These statements with reference to the parents are not made in any sense
of condemnation, for the parents, too, were undoubtedly the victims of varied
forces over which they had little or no control. The facts are simply stated
as they were observed.
In searching for the motive lying back of this lad’s delinquencies, one is im
pressed by the fact that he never took more than seemed to be necessary for
the needs o f the moment, regardless of how much was available. H e spent little
upon himself. He was sharing generously with a small group of recently
acquired friends, and the money he stole gave him an entree to this group
which otherwise would have been denied. This shy, self-conscious, poorly
equipped boy, without interests or abilities recognized, by those of his age,
and out of harmony with his family, had also suffered by comparison with
his well-mannered, obedient sister, who was the favorite in the family. He
had never been trained in habits leading to self-assurance and self-esteem,
which, in turn, would have permitted him to assume responsibility. H e was
simply utilizing the same technique which he had used all his life in the
home and which had been overlooked by parents afraid of meeting the situation
frankly.
It had not taken Neal long to find out that human contacts with others
of his own age and a little social recognition from those whom he admired
could be purchased, for the time being at least, by this asocial activity. Had
the boy’s problem been frankly met and adequately dealt with— that is, had
he been assisted in finding more suitable means of gaining recognition in
a socially approved way through games, social contacts, friendship, develop
ment o f habits and intellectual achievements that were all within his grasp—
the prognosis would have been much better and both boy and fam ily much
happier. Even as the situation existed, the same plan of educating both parents
and boy to meet life on a more mature level was followed, but the advice in
this case had to come from outside the home rather than from the parents
themselves.

The important aspect o f the whole situation is the fact that steal
ing in this particular case was not an end in itself, but simply a
means o f satisfying one o f the instinctive strivings common to all,
whether children or adults; namely, the desire for recognition. In
the process of growing up, the well-trained child develops a variety
o f tools which are admirably suited for this purpose, and he does not
have to resort to asocial conduct to gain attention.
The case just cited differs in many respects from that o f Wendell, a 17-yearold boy whose family background was excellent and whose parents were suc
cessful, happy, well stabilized. Up to the time that he was dismissed from
school for stealing, he was himself what might be called a well-adjusted
adolescent; that is, he enjoyed good health, was a fair athlete, had a pleasing
personality, made friends easily, and enjoyed the reputation of being well liked
and getting on easily with people.
In the new environment of a boarding school, Wendell’s suddenly acquired
freedom tended toward the development of appetites that soon outgrew his

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ASOCIAL CONDUCT

pocketbook; and in spite of his early training, he drifted into irresponsible
ways and was soon detected in appropriating the property o f other students.
These thefts were carried out only after careful planning and premeditation,
and what he appropriated was spent, to a very large extent, upon himself.
This boy’s conduct was entirely out o f harmony with his previous training.
H e feared detection and consequently resorted to lying. H e worried a great
deal about the final day o f reckoning. There seemed to be no deep underlying
conflicts in life in this particular case to account for the boy’s delinquencies,
and he showed a marked sense o f relief when he was detected and had the
opportunity o f starting all over even with the world, so to speak. Subsequent
events have indicated that stealing in this boy’s life was a rather transitory
phase. A s the cooperation of wise parents and a sympathetic headmaster
could be counted on, and as the boy was without fundamental handicaps or
emotional conflicts, there was little reason to believe that this boy would have
any further difficulties with reference to stealing.

The fact that the detection of the stealing brought Wendell in
contact with someone who was interested in the problems o f young
people and that his parents were reawakened to their own personal
responsibilities presented an opportunity to this boy for taking
account o f stock, not only with reference to his stealing but in re
gard to many other problems in life. Thus the whole incident un
doubtedly served a very useful purpose.
It is not uncommon to see superior and well-trained boys, coming
from good homes with intelligent parents, occasionally getting into
serious difficulties through participation in gang life. As one studies
these situations, one is struck by the fact that many o f these lads
suffer from feelings o f inferiority. They have a tendency to drift
to a lower social and economic level, where they can make friends and
perhaps assume some leadership with a minimum amount o f effort.
They feel the necessity o f demonstrating to themselves, as well as to
others, that they are not inadequate, and one way of doing this is
by assuming a “ hard-boiled ” attitude. They have a fear o f being
called yellow.’ They want to demonstrate their leadership by something that is spectacular and will demand attention. The asocial
activity o f this particular group o f boys needs most careful consid
eration, as such boys are likely to become the tools later on for those
more cunning and shrewd individuals who dominate gang life.
Often these youngsters are actually terrified after their escapades.
They eat poorly, their nights are sleepless, they are constantly wor
ried and agitated, and they are much relieved when they get up
courage enough to confide in friend or parent or even when they
have been detected. Parents who are on intimate terms with their
children can recognize the early symptoms o f these feelings o f in
feriority in their children and make every attempt to find ways and
means o f substituting activities that will offer opportunities o f
achieving legitimate success.

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Stealing is undoubtedly less common with girls than with boys.
Girls have less demand upon them for money during the adolescent
period, their contacts are less likely to be of the type which would
present opportunities for stealing, and gang life, as we understand
it, is a less important aspect o f the girl’s life than o f the boy’s.
However, stealing occurs among girls with sufficient frequency to
be worthy o f serious consideration.
The desire for self-adornment and for appearing well dressed is
oftentimes the motivating force behind much of the petty thieving
that occurs among girls in boarding schools and colleges, and the
stealing itself is oftentimes characterized by an impulsiveness which
is less common in boys.
Geraldine was a young girl who had always had a reputation for honesty and
had always respected the property rights o f others. One day while visiting
a large department store she impulsively and clumsily appropriated a ring from
a tray which was being displayed to prospective customers. Upon being con
fronted with the theft, she immediately confessed but developed conflicts from
her own unworthiness which were more or less incapacitating for several weeks.
This particular isolated asocial act was entirely out of harmony with her own
ideals and the fundamental moral attitudes which she had always had toward
life.

A 16-year-old girl, whose case was discussed in Child Manage
ment (p. 41), was brought to court on a charge o f breaking and
entering. Investigation showed that on three occasions she had
gone to the house o f her best friend and stolen wearing apparel,
skates, and a ring, all of which she had carefully hidden away and
made no attempt to use or sell. A rather long, detailed story of
the case revealed the fact that, in spite of her extreme fondness for
her friend, she had times when she became intensely jealous of her,
especially when the other girl appeared in new clothes which her
own parents could not afford to buy. It was after such periods of
jealousy that she committed the thefts.
INCORRIGIBILITY

There is a group of adolescents who, in spite o f good intellectual
equipment, excellent health, and what appears to be a satisfactory
environment, have a mental make-up that is characterized by a sense
o f resentment of authority, irresponsibility, cruelty, and pugnacity.
These individuals are invariably unstable emotionally, and with their
sudden changes in mood and conduct, they are very difficult indi
viduals to deal with successfully. The court looks upon them as
being incorrigible, meaning that they do not respond to the ordinary
methods of correction. The psychiatrists call them psychopathic
personalities, constitutional inferiors, psychopaths, and various other
names that add little to understanding o f the forces tending to

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ASOCIAL CONDUCT

produce conduct so bizarre and purposeless. Despite their unhappy
mental attitude toward life, these individuals frequently resent any
effort on the part o f parents or outsiders to help them. There is
a gulf between their ambitions and their achievements. They are
anxious to grow up all at once and often regard being “ hardboiled ” as evidence of manhood. In spite of their bullying, brag
ging, and egotism, they are lacking in self-confidence and selfassurance 5 yet they assume the attitude that they are right and
the world is wrong, and they utilize every conceivable method they
can in getting even with their unjust world.
Invariably the parents become the victims of these moods. This
is quite naturally so,'as these individuals have learned from ex
perience that parents are more tolerant than the general public and
therefore safer to defy. Through fear or ignorance parents may
then neglect to take a firm stand and so continue to be humiliated
and persecuted. They present the most difficult cases to deal with—
cases in which parents arouse antagonism and resentment in those
whom they are trying to help. Regardless o f how sincere their
intentions may be, such parents are apt to be hurt and crushed. It
is for one outside the family, free from passion and prejudice, to
deal with these situations. But more important and less difficult
than treatment is prevention.
Adolescent reactions of this type are not developed overnight.
They begin fairly early in life, and it is not difficult for parents
to see the early evidences o f dissatisfactidh. The child who begins
to build up petty grievances, who is always complaining o f not
getting a square deal at school, not being liked by the children,
being slighted at parties, being discriminated against by parents,
who is always calling himself down and in a general way taking
a critical view o f life, is manifesting the early symptoms o f a state
o f mind that is likely to become more and more a fixed part o f his
personality make-up as he advances in years.
As parents, we must keep in mind that defiance and sullenness
cannot be overcome by force and disciplinary measures. Neither
does moralizing serve any useful purpose when the child’s attitude
toward life is twisted and warped by his confusion and dissatis
faction. This situation calls for supreme patience on the part o f
the parents. They must think in terms, for the moment at least,
o f making the child happy rather than either obedient or efficient.
This can best be done by helping the child regain his self-confidence,
restore his self-esteem, and overcome his tendency toward developing
ideas of inadequacy. It is essential that parents take account o f
the child’s assets, placing him, as much as possible, in situations where
these assets can be used to best advantage. It is well, too, for them

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to attempt to eliminate sources o f friction and to withdraw, so far as
it is compatible with the child’s safety, much o f their parental
authority. A ll too frequently these rebellious youngsters need at
least a momentary freedom in order that they may demonstrate to
themselves that freedom is only a means to an end and not an end
in itself.
It is striking that this particular group o f unhappy, resentful
adolescents invariably react worse in the home situation than any
where else. For this reason, they impress their elders painfully
with their ingratitude, selfishness, and oftentimes cruelty. A ll these
traits, however, are quite as distasteful to the child as to the parent.
This is particularly true when the parents happen to be thé type
of individuals who interpret everything that happens in an environ
ment in terms of how it affects themselves.
Sylvester's father had habitually utilized force and disciplinary measures in
meeting all family problems and was tremendously upset when his 17-year-old
boy suddenly and quite unexpectedly retaliated, meeting the father’s repri
mand by becoming insolent, defiant, and, a little later, opening a fistic combat.
After completely subduing the father, he made clear in no uncertain terms the
extent to which he resented the physical force which the father had been using
over a period of years, and the hatred which this had built up. He also made it
clear that he considered himself the unfavored member of the family and that
he resented all the attention given to his younger sister.
The real conflict between the father and son was due to the fact that this
well-developed, rather sophisticated lad had been trying hard to grow up all
of a sudden. He had sought #ie companionship of older boys, had participated
with them in some smoking and drinking, and had been playing about with a
group of boys and girls who were definitely older than he. The father, how
ever, still looked upon this lad, who was fast approaching adult life in his
thought and experiences, as a mere child and continued to assert authority over
him that would only have been justified had he been 10 years younger. H e
was impressed with the necessity of breaking this rebellious spirit and bringing
the boy into submission before it was too late.

We oftentimes make the mistake o f endeavoring to do a job in a
few days that really requires months, forgetting that although some
habits can be eradicated in a short time, sometimes in a few days,
personality traits and mental attitudes toward life lend themselves
less readily to abrupt changes.
The real conflicts that lead to unmanageableness may not manifest
themselves until the child finds out, through leaving home, how
inadequately he has been prepared to meet life as it actually exists.
Laura had apparently made a perfectly good adjustment to home life, but
she found on entering college that the protective, oversolicitous attitude of her
parents had not provided the training which would permit her to fit in and
assume the social responsibilities of other girls of her age. Upon returning home
for her vacation she became extremely resentful and critical of her parents,
holding them responsible for sending her to college with such a limited knowl-

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ASOCIAL CONDUCT

edge of life in general. She blamed them for her unhappiness, for her lack of
friends, and for various humiliating situations which she had encountered
while away from home. She criticized the home, she ridiculed the father’s
income as being insufficient to provide a decent home, and she commented sar
castically on all their opinions and beliefs. Her resentment was expressed only
in words, however, and not in deeds. Her chief satisfaction was in demonstrat
ing her power to hurt her parents. Underneath this turbulent attitude the girl
was shy, diffident, and retiring ; she had none of the pseudosophisticated habits
or attitudes considered as characteristic of rebellious adolescents ; and her chief
concern in life was the fear that she was not like other girls.

The grievances of these unmanageable children, however, are not always
directed toward parents. Wilfred!» were, for example, all directed toward the
school authorities. A t 15 years of age he had a record of either having run
away or having been expelled from four different boarding schools in a period
o f 3 years after having first expressed his feelings about his teachers and the
schools in notes written in such profane and obscene language that expulsion
was inevitable. This was perhaps an indirect way o f humiliating his parents,
who had not created a home life for him but had instead traveled about seeking
pleasure and satisfactions in which he had no part. This particular boy had
always wanted a home, had felt the need o f his parents, and had resented the
fact that these schools had been offered to him as substitutes for a home.

The foregoing cases indicate that in order to solve the conduct
disorders o f youth one must be sufficiently interested to take time to
determine what these asocial activities really mean to the child.
Most o f this type o f behavior can be modified to the advantage of
all concerned as soon as the conduct is thought of as a symptom
which has its basis in an unsatisfactory adjustment between the child
and his environment. The rebellious, delinquent, poorly adjusted
child is invariably an unhappy child.

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In the tragic conflict between what he has been taught to desire and what
he is allowed to get, man has found in alcohol, as he has found in certain
other drugs, a sinister but effective peacemaker, a means of securing, for
however short a time, some way out of the prison house of reality back to
the Golden Age. (Trotter, W illia m : Instincts of the Herd in Peace and W ar,
p. 58.

Macmillan Co., New York, 1926.)

There is ft large army of individuals who are incapacitated to a
greater or less degree for meeting the ordinary everyday problems
of life not because o f any impairment o f their intellectual faculties
nor because o f any physical conditions or disease which can be
revealed by clinical examination, but because they have become the
victims o f an emotional outlook upon life which leads them to evade
reality.
Many o f the manifestations o f an evasion of reality are found in
individuals who have failed to grow up, who have been inadequately
prepared through training and experience to meet life on the level
which their chronological age would indicate. It is therefore impor
tant that in the process of training children parents beware of the
subtle technics which children utilize at an early age to avoid meet
ing the difficult situations in life.
The child who in early life has learned to use temper tantrums
as a way of gaining his own end, who avoids an unpleasant school
situation by vomiting or having stomachaches, who always has the
ever-convenient headache when called upon to assume some respon
sibility, is manifesting the first evidences o f such tendencies.
Parents who are intimately acquainted with their children, who
are familiar with their habitual reactions to life, should be the first
to notice any unusual deviation from the normal which would be the
first indication that the adolescent is in need o f help. The tend
ency to evade reality may take various forms, such as romancing,
daydreaming, cheating, running away, drinking, and similar mani
festations which frequently give concern to parents of adolescent boys
and girls.
DAYDREAMING AND ROMANCING

Both daydreaming and romancing are common methods used by
adolescents to evade unsatisfactory situations through a retreat into
the world o f phantasy.
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Daydreaming is indulged in at some time or other by almost every
body and need not be a dangerous pastime for the adolescent unless
he prefers his daydreams to normal contacts with other young people
or seeks in them a means o f escape from inner conflicts and feelings
o f inadequacy. Romancing, which is but daydreaming aloud, may
be defined as an attempt on the part o f the individual to bolster up
his self-regard and the esteem in which he desires to be held by
others by fabricating tales which enhance his prestige, add influence
or distinction to his family background, and in general exaggerate
his own importance. Romancing is a less dangerous method than
daydreaming o f compensating for feelings of inadequacy, because
it has the advantage of being detectable before it becomes too deeply
rooted in the personality make-up of the individual.
The adolescent who makes excursions into the land o f unreality
may be less annoying to his elders than the one who indulges in
temper tantrums or other types o f vexatious behavior, but such prac
tices may be fundamentally more harmful to healthy mental de
velopment. Boys and girls should be helped to realize that they can
win the recognition they desire through active effort in some given
field rather than through such unsatisfactory methods as romancing
and daydreaming.
CHEATING

ff
*

The habit of cheating and the tendency toward evasion are util
ized by children, adolescents, and adults in attempting to attain cer
tain objectives in life without making the necessary effort; they are
found in those individuals who are constantly seeking “ short cuts
to prosperity.” Such conduct is not uncommonly found in schools
and colleges with reference to examinations. One child may cheat
in order to get passing marks, while another individual will cheat
in order to stand at the head o f the class. There are those who are
always seeking the opportunity to “ put it over ” the person who
happens to be in authority, whether it is the parent, the teacher, the
counselor, or the employer.
The love o f winning or the inability to lose gracefully—that atti
tude called poor sportsmanship— may lead to difficulties in this
direction; so will an exaggerated desire for power and recognition
and for freedom. The inability that many individuals have to
meet any situation frankly, that is, just as it exists, also leads to
cheating, evasiveness, and lying. Cheating is an individual’s at
tempt to obtain under false pretenses something which he fears he
could not get by more honest methods.
The tendency to practice evasion is seen in most children at some
time or other. It is unfortunate that parents are inclined to look

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upon this tendency lightly, calling these attempts cute tricks and
bolstering up their own fears with the idea that the tendency will
soon be outgrown. The parent who allows the child to evade carry
ing out his part of a contract, whether it be doing certain chores
about the house, accepting praise for something he has not accom
plished, or keeping the change that he should return after doing
an errand, is permitting that child to entertain false ideas with
reference to his obligations and responsibilities to others. It should
also be remembered that one can be quite as dishonest in dealing
with time as in dealing with money or examinations.
It is important to inculcate a sense o f fair play at an early age in
order that the child may develop the habit of looking at life frankly
and honestly, sizing up the prospective difficulties and pitfalls and
planning how to meet them. It is not difficult for even very young
children to learn that the practice of deception rarely works out to
their advantage. It is perfectly true that certain individuals may be
confronted with a situation where cheating represents an unrepeated
incident in their lives; but by the time the child reaches the adoles
cent age, these isolated experiences which bear little relation to the
best moral standards of the individual are rare. They are more
likely to occur in those individuals who suddenly and unexpectedly
are confronted with keen competition and resort to this unfair
method as a way of “ putting themselves across.”
In the school, cheating is often carried on by students bringing
material into the classroom for aid in examination, or by copying
from another pupil. A rather common form of cheating is pre
senting themes and other written work as original when, as a matter
of fact, they are copied. Even at the college age themes that have
been copied word for word are often handed in as a student’s own
eifort. Oftentimes such experiences lead to a very serious conflict,
as in the case o f a college girl who was so much upset by the fact
that she had repeatedly cheated in the examination room without
being detected, that she voluntarily admitted the fact to the head o f
the course, much to her own relief.
In games and sports there are also various ways of cheating. One
o f the more subtle was observed in Gilbert, a 14-year-old lad who
was a fairly good athlete but a poor sport. He excelled in tennis;
but on several occasions when he was threatened with defeat, he
would refuse to continue a match on the ground that his eyes were
bothering him. Repeated examinations by a specialist indicated that
the affected eyesight was but a way o f avoiding actual defeat.
These few examples bring out the fact that it is tremendously
important for children to learn how to meet failure as well as success
in early life. There is a tendency on the part o f those interested

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in children to stress the value of success, and this is important. But
the child who has never learned how to meet defeat and disappointment is poorly equipped to battle with life.
TRUANCY

Pushed by the spirit o f the “ wanderlust ” , many o f the more ven
turesome children seek adventure and new experiences outside their
immediate environment. These individuals are less concerned about
their security than the average boy or girl. They seem to have an
inherent hunger to investigate all that is strange and new. Their
homes may be good, their parents just, and they themselves without
any deep underlying conflict. Truancy in these cases is but the re
sponse to a deep underlying urge to satisfy something that is closely
allied to curiosity. On the other hand, a certain number o f truant
individuals are not running to something but away from something,
and in this group truancy and delinquency often go hand in hand.
Truancy in these situations is but the result o f conflict between
the individual and his environment. When the home atmosphere
is unhappy because of constant friction and emotional tension or
when punishment is severe and unjust or when failure in school
with its accompanying humiliation is inevitable, or when the in
dividual is in the grip of a feeling o f inadequacy, truancy may be
an escape closely allied to alcohol, illness, and other similar types o f
escape utilized later in life.
It is the state of mind that activates truancy rather than the
truancy itself which must be looked upon as the vital and dangerous
aspect o f the situation. This state of mind is exemplified by Nor
man, a 16-year-old boy with a good average intellectual equipment.

'Norman had enjoyed good health until he was about 8 years of age with
the exception of a chronic asthmatic condition which restricted his athletic
activities. H e was the son of a highly skilled mining engineer who was a
friendly, kindly individual, but who, for some reason, failed to understand
this boy and offered him but little companionship. H is mother was an emo
tionally unstable woman and had been steeped in deep sorrow for 5 years
on account of the loss of Norman’s younger brother. His school work had
been average, or a bit better, up to the time he was 14, when he was kept out
of school on account o f a severe infection. Upon his return he had apparently
lost not only much ground but all his interest in school work. He was resent
ful about being left behind his classmates, and this attitude reflected itself in
his conduct in the home. H e became extremely critical of his father, demand
ing in his attitude toward his mother, resentful toward all criticism, and
rebellious toward authority; he lost many of his friends, became extremely
unhappy, and was given to short periods of depression.
It was during such periods of depression that he first began to disappear
from home. After not letting his parents know where he was for several
days at a time, he would telegraph for money. These episodes of running
182415°— 33----- 6

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GTJIDING TH E ADOLESCENT

away were causing his parents so much anxiety that they were both on the
verge of a breakdown.
__.
Fortunately this boy had some ability in drawing that had been recogni d
by a friend of the family who was in a position to place him with a competent
instructor away from home. He was advised to leave school and build his
life around this real interest, and thus his problem was solved in a most
satisfactory way.
An isolated example of truancy from camp may be seen in the case of
Lincoln, a 15-year-old boy whose father attempted to place him in a camp
against his will, thinking that as soon as the boy was happily settled
experience would work out to his advantage. Under the pretense of seeing
a friend, the boy was inveigled to visit a camp with his father. After spend
ing the afternoon happily with the group he found that his father had slipped
away, leaving him in charge of the camp director. This method of leavetaking was not in keeping with the frankness which had been displayed be
tween father and son up to this time, and the boy was much upset. H e took
the first opportunity of leaving the camp, much to his father’s dismay. Here
the father resorted to a plan of deception not unlike some of the very practices
which he was most earnestly endeavoring to overcome in the boy.

It is not infrequent to find parents, either habitually or in despera
tion, as in the above case, doing this very thing, meeting anger with
anger and deception with more deception. Such a plan may work
out for the moment, but it will not ultimately be successful. Frank
ness may make for temporary rebellion, but it never destroys the
confidence and respect which are essential for the happy relation
between the adult and the adolescent.
DRINKING

I f the adolescent is introduced to alcohol, it is invariably through
his social activities, and his continued use o f it is likely to be a
symptom of some inadequacy and instability. For the less cou
rageous, those who feel inferior, it is the most dangerous weapon
with which they can play, as it temporarily bolsters up their courage,
gives them a transient sense o f well being and a false sense of
importance, and relieves them of certain painful inhibitions only to
leave them pitifully weak and helpless without it.
Rarely can the problem be adequately met by disciplinary measures,
deprivation o f freedom, or moralizing tactics. The best safeguard
that parents can throw about the adolescent to prevent indiscretion in
the use o f alcohol is education, and the best method of education is

One of life’s earliest, most difficult, and most painful lessons is
that we cannot indulge without discrimination the varied impulses
and desires that are constantly being aroused and seeking avenues

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good example.

EVADING REALITY

o f expression without getting into trouble with society or creating
conflicts within ourselves. Long before we appreciate just why we
should not pull the covers off the table, hurl the ornaments about
the room, pinch, squeeze, and annoy younger members o f the family,
run blindly out into the crowded street, take candy, food, or money
which does not belong to us, or do innumerable other things, we
learn that such behavior brings swift and painful punishment or
in some way or other works out to our disadvantage.
The great masses o f the boys and girls of this country, with a
newly acquired freedom, with unbounded opportunity for liberty
and license, associated with a realization o f the force that they are
capable o f exerting upon the community, have taken their newly
acquired privileges, all o f them laden with the stuff that just
naturally leads to revolt, and have managed themselves with wisdom
that should demand more respect and less criticism from adults,
whose criticism is, after all, bred o f fear of what is going to happen
next.

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THE ADOLESCENT AND HIS COMPANIONS
They seem to take away the sun from the world who withdraw friendship
from life.

(Cicero.)

THE IMPORTANCE OF FRIENDS

There is no phase in the individual’s life in which friends count
more than during the adolescent period. As has been pointed out,
this stage o f development in the child’s life is characterized by in
tensity of feeling in combination with lack of experience to guide
and direct these intense emotions with the wisdom of more mature
years. There can be many substitutes for intimate friendships dur
ing childhood—brothers and sisters, parents, and the innumerable
individuals with whom the child meets in the daily routine; like
wise in adulthood, one’s family, business, and other interests, or
one’s philosophy o f life may make intimate friendships unnecessary.
It is extremely difficult, however, for the adolescent to accept any
thing in place o f his chum, his pal, his buddy, or whatever else he
may call that individual in whom he can confide with absolute
assurance o f receiving a sympathetic hearing and being understood.
The need for intimate associations with those o f one’s own age is
greater during this period, because adolescents are apt to entertain
the idea that they are but little understood by the adult world.
Thus the boy or girl who in the process o f development has not
acquired those personal characteristics which are essential to making
friends is a pathetic figure. He represents one o f the real catastro
phes o f life, and his situation is one o f the most difficult to face,
for although he appreciates his own needs he may fail entirely to
understand why he does not measure up.
It is unfortunate indeed that those traits or lack o f traits in one s
personality make-up which are essential in building up the close
personal contacts which we look upon as friendships, are very often
dependent upon environmental situations over which the individual
has no control until the damage has been done. Yet, as one sees
children during their early life, one may be easily aware o f the
fact that there are also inherent traits which apparently allow one
group o f children to be responsive to attention and to react with
pleasure, while the other group tends to withdraw, reject, and be
offended by quite the same overtures. The fact that these responses
to life are exaggerated by the environment—that is, that attention
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-Jr

is invariably given where it is appreciated— is obvious to all who
are concerned with the behavior of children.
Certain mental characteristics, or personality traits, are found
sufficiently often, however, in these friendless, lonesome individuals
to make it seem only fair to assume that these traits in themselves
represent the barrier between the child and the social group with
whom he is brought in contact. There is, for example, the shy,
diffident, reserved youngster who is inclined to be very introspec
tive, who is extremely sensitive not only to the impressions that
he makes upon the world but to the impressions that the world makes
upon him. Everything seems to register, and everything that regis
ters must necessarily be analyzed; it is in the process o f examining
and tearing these ordinary, everyday situations apart that the indh
vidual becomes more and more self-centered. Later in life he de
velops feelings of inferiority and inadequacy; he is prone to be
unduly critical about himself, not infrequently setting his standards
for himself so high that failure is inevitable.
The question arises: What are the environmental situations that
are likely to produce this state o f mind in the child when he is
called upon to confront life during the adolescent period? As has
been stated, the family may be substituted for friends during early
life ; but it is not uncommon for parents to put such a value on
family life and to derive so much pleasure and satisfaction from
their children that they very selfishly hold them too close to the
family circle. Home life may be made so pleasant and attractive
and in subtle ways so easy during the early years o f life that there
is little incentive for the child to reach out and make intimate con
tacts with the outside world. Then, too, the child may be cut off
rom outside contact at a very important period in life because o f
some accident or illness which makes a temporary invalid o f him
so that after recovery he may find it difficult to pick up the thread
o f social relationships where it was dropped. The fact that parents
move about and that the place o f residence is frequently changed
or possibly changed at a rather critical time in the child’s life is
another factor worthy of consideration. This important aspect’ o f
the child’s life should always be kept in mind when a change o f
schools is under consideration. T o be taken away at the age o f
8 or 9 from the group with whom he has played about for 3 or 4
years is a real calamity to one child, while another child will immediately make a place for himself in the new situation without any
difficulty whatsoever.

In some homes neighborliness and intimate contacts are frowned
Parents
not encourage their children to visit other
children nor to bring other children home, fearing that such visiting

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GUIDING TH E ADOLESCENT

may involve some social obligation with the parents of these other
boys and girls. There is a lack o f cordiality in such a home that
cannot but affect certain children in their early relationships with
others. In other homes there is a critical attitude toward the
neighbors’ children and toward the neighbors themselves that is
also restraining. For example, Johnny may be told that the chil
dren o f one family are too dirty and rough or too indecent in their
language to play with, other children are to be avoided because
their families are economically or socially inferior, and another
group may be undesirable because o f racial or religious differences.
Some families simply fall back on their old conclusion that John
gets along so much better and causes so much less trouble if he
keeps by himself; he either gets excited or uses bad words, or comes
in all tired out or unpardonably dirty when he is allowed to partici
pate in the activities o f the group. These excuses are born o f
twisted, snobbish, arrogant, or intolerant attitudes on the part o f
certain parents, or are resorted to in an effort to make the job of
rearing children as easy as possible. They are all, however, im
portant factors in the development o f certain traits that interfere
with making friendships easily in later life.
Following is an example o f yet another way in which an indi
vidual’s ability to make friends may be unwittingly interfered- with
early in life :

3*»

Lydia, was a bright, attractive child with a keen desire for friendships,
but at the age of 16 years she was still too shy and diffident to make a place
for herself with other girls.
Having lost her mother very early in life, she was brought up by her father
and an elderly grandmother. The former disliked groups o f people, preferring
not to have more than one person around at a tim e; the latter was hypersensi
tive to noise of any kind and thought “ children should be seen and not
heard.”
In such an environment Lydia had little opportunity for cultivating friend
ships by inviting people to her own home. Moreover, she had no opportunity
for developing the self-confidence necessary to enable her to approach the
girls with whom she much wanted to be friends. These girls, on the other
hand, completely failed to understand her and made no effort to become more
closely acquainted with her. It was little wonder that she began to feel that
she must be different from other girls, and then that she must be inferior
to them.

It is the individual of this type who reads with alternate despair
and hope the magazine advertisements picturing the unpopular boy
or girl and assuring the reader that the use o f the right soaps,
creams, deodorants, pomades, antiseptics, and cigarettes, and a study
o f the right books on etiquette, grammar, and literature will prevent
this casualty.

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*
it

TH E ADOLESCENT AND H IS COMPANIONS

Personal cleanliness and fastidiousness are indeed important in
helping the individual to get on with people. A report o f a school
for truant boys contains the sad record o f a lad who had run away
from his school because the offensive odor from a catarrhal condi
tion had made him subject to the persecutions o f his classmates.
Such problems doubtless stand in the way o f the adolescent’s social
adjustment more frequently than parents realize. They are things
to be watched for, and appropriate suggestions and advice should
be offered. But the ability to make and keep friends is not solely
dependent on good habits o f health, cleanliness, and grammar; some
people make friends in spite o f lacking such good habits, whereas
others fail in spite of having them. Let us by all means encourage
good hygiene and personal fastidiousness, but let us also encourage
individual personality development through intelligent, sympathetic,
and unselfish guidance.

*r Jr

“ CRUSHES”

While some adolescents need help in learning to make friends at
all, others need help in learning to maintain a sense of balance in
their friendships. They must learn to keep their interest open in
many people instead o f centering all their attention, affection, admi
ration, and devotion in one person of their own sex.
Adolescent crushes are very common and can usually be looked
upon as a normal phase o f development. There are, however, a
certain number o f these intimate relationships between individuals
of the same sex that either because o f their intensity or because of
their duration require serious consideration. Parents and teachers
ofttimes need to use great care and judgment in handling these
situations in order that they may be most helpful to those who quite
innocently become involved in some alliance which might become
quite disastrous to the parties involved.
Crushes that continue are o f significance not because o f any un
desirable activity but because o f their interference with the natural,
normal, healthy development of broad social contacts which are o f
special importance during this period in life. These intense emo
tional reactions between those o f the same sex, more commonly seen
in girls than in boys, are all-absorbing and in most cases leave no
time nor interest for other social contacts. A t best, when one o f
those involved gets a more mature outlook on life and seeks a broader
field for personal relationships with both boys and girls, the other
is invariably hurt.
As will be seen in some o f the case discussions, while the crush
is on, any attempt to break it up or interfere in any way is met with
open rebellion. Any criticism directed by friends or family is re-

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sented. The parties to the experience glory in their loyalty toward
each other. Invariably they entertain the idea that this relationship
is something given to them alone, that no one has ever before experienced the joy of such a friendship, and that, therefore, no one
else is capable o f understanding it. Quite rightly they resent any
intimation that there is anything wrong or bad about this relation
ship. To those caught emotionally in this snare, it symbolizes all
that is good and worth while. Helping these young people to get
a proper perspective o f this particular problem in relation to the
entire life situation is therefore a delicate task.
Fortunately when the fires burn so intensely, they do not last long,
and most of these crush situations are self-eliminating. I f managed
wisely, they do no harm. It is not so much the crush itself that
needs careful consideration as the individuals participating in it.
When such a relationship exists between individuals who because o f
their shyness, diffidence, and lack o f confidence are unable to “ put
themselves across ” in a normal way with the group, it requires all
the skill and ingenuity o f the adults who are trying to help them to
find ways and means of developing new interests which may serve
as a diversion while these young people are finding themselves.
The family must be tolerant and not give the impression by word
or by deed that they are persecuting either party. They may judiciously introduce other young people o f interest into the home life or
arrange for a visit that would temporarily separate the two young
people. Plans for a summer at camp might be considered, depend
ing upon the situation and the extent to which the affair has de
veloped. Whatever may be the plan, it will require nice judgment
and much toleration and patience, but it will be worth the effort.
The future happiness of these adolescents may depend upon estab
lishing their lives on a more satisfactory basis rather than one which
is narrow and emotional.

^
^
I

,
r

Alice was a very attractive, intelligent young girl, 16 years of age, who was
causing her parents a great deal o f concern because she had developed a very
resentful attitude toward authority, was extremely antagonistic toward all
suggestions, and seemed hypercritical toward life in general. This young
person had lived rather a secluded life and had made but few contacts with
young people, either boys or girls. Then very suddenly she had developed an
intense admiration for a girl who was somewhat older than herself and who
came from a somewhat lower social and cultural level. The older girl was
flattered by Alice’s attentions, invitations, letters, and gifts and clung quite

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as closely to Alice as did Alice to her.
A ll attempts on the part of Alice’s parents to meet this problem first by
teasing and ridicule, later by threats, punishments, and deprivations, served no
useful purpose. They did nothing more than make this young person feel that
the object of her devotion was being maligned and persecuted. It was never
suspected by the fam ily that the girl herself had a good many conflicts over

TH E ADOLESCENT AND H IS COMPANIONS

this relationship, that she was eager to broaden her contacts, and that she was
extremely desirous o f having friends among boys as well as girls. On account
o f the circumstances under which she had been brought up and a certain
inherent shyness and diffidence, a special effort had to be made on the part o f
her parents to help her meet the young people among whom such friendships
could develop. This they were perfectly willing to do when they understood
the emotional nature o f the problem.

f'
)

►
M

♦
A

The teacher is often able to offer assistance in these situations
because she may approach the subject with these young people in
a perfectly natural and unemotional way by discussing the subject
friendships— the importance o f first making broad general con
tacts which are interesting and profitable in an educational way and
then o f cultivating the more intimate relationships upon which men
and women place great value all through life. The disadvantages
o f cutting one’s self off from the broad social contacts o f the school,
community, or the camp for the sake of devoting one’s time to
any one individual can be made quite clear, and it is not difficult to
explain how these emotional tie-ups between those o f the same sex
often lead away from a well-rounded-out life in the future. There
may be particular reasons for going into the subject more deeply;
it may be brought out, for instance, that one may' get in the habit
avoiding contact with those o f the opposite sox because of the
ease and satisfaction with which the present relationship can be
carried on, and that one may thus close the door to healthy contacts
leading to normal mating, marriage, children, and a home.
These emotional situations must never be looked upon as occasions
which necessitate trying to make young people good through fear
o f consequences. They represent just another opportunity for the
parents and the child to get together and discuss the whole situa
tion and all its implications in an unemotional way. The task of
passing through that immature stage where autoerotic tendencies
and crushes play an important part in life confronts every adolescent
and is a difficult one for many o f these young people. They fear
to take the next step forward, oftentimes being filled with a feeling
that they are unable to meet it adequately.
But they are very quick to grasp any real understanding which
their elders may have o f the problem and to reach out for help
when they have reason to believe that it is available.
Many o f the doubts and misgivings these young people have with
reference to taking the next step in their social development are
due to the fact that their early experiences in their own homes have
prejudiced them against marriage. A mother whose marital life
has been unhappy and whose dissatisfactions have been an ever
present example to her children, who presents marriage, particularly
the sex aspect of it, as something to be avoided, is a tremendous

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obstacle to the normal, healthy development of her sons and daugh
ters. Such childhood experiences are the most common factors lead
ing to social immaturity in these unhappy children. The develop
ment o f a normal, happy, well-adjusted sex life in young people is
more dependent upon the examples they have before them than on
all the instruction one can give.
BOY AND GIRL RELATIONSHIPS

W ith the advent of the coeducational system in the schools and
the discovery that participation in athletics would not incapacitate
girls for performing their major function in life, a more normal
and natural everyday relationship between boys and girls was inevi
table. Seeing each other under the prosaic circumstances o f 8 o’clock
classes, playing at the same games, working side by side whether on
class plays or on school annuals, studying the same subjects, boys
and girls came to a clearer understanding o f each other. Boys soon
discarded the Victorian conception o f femininity and, instead of
regarding girls as vague and mysterious combinations of physical
frailty, intellectual stupidity, and frigid spirituality, they accepted
them as “ pals ” , companions, and friends, while girls responded with
a frankness bred o f their own more honest recognition of boys.
This closer acquaintanceship between the sexes cannot but be re
garded as wholesome. In the world o f today men and women must
work and play side by side. How will they learn to do this if they
spend their entire youth carefully isolated from each other, fed on
mysterious illusions o f differences that may not exist? The element
o f romance with which young people wish to endow each other in
their love relationships need not be lacking because of the better
acquaintance o f boys and girls in general; on the contrary, being
adequately protected against endowing all girls or all boys with
glamor, they should be better able to discriminate in their choice o f
the particular partner they seek.
Friendships between boy and girl, as between girl and girl, gen
erally prove o f greater value and greater happiness in the plural
than in the singular during adolescence.
Parents are likely to be most concerned over the sexual significance
o f these relationships. This being true, they express great anxiety
over the much-discussed subject of petting.
W e shall probably all agree that there is nothing particularly new
about this practice of petting, excepting for the fact that it is now
practiced more generally among those who are considered nice people,
that it has become more o f a pastime and perhaps less well defined
as a step leading to matrimony, and finally that it is no longer a
practice reserved for the subdued lights o f the family parlor, the

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-4 *

country wayside, or other secluded spots. In the automobile, on the
beach, in the village green, in the city park, on the dance floor, on
the public street, in the electric cars, and one might say wherever
adolescents as a group can be seen, petting may be witnessed. There
appears to be a casual indifference with many young people to what
those about see or say regarding their activities in public. These
observations can be made by anyone at any time, and almost
anywhere.
It is difficult to account for what appears to be a decided change
in the attitude o f adolescents toward petting, and it is equally difficult
to evaluate what it all means in terms o f promiscuous sex activity.
Certainly there is no reason to believe that the sex urge is more
demanding at the present time than it has been in years past. Prob
ably time will reveal that more young people o f all types are indulg
ing in these activities and that they have not changed materially in
degree and intensity.
One thinks, o f course, o f the automobile, modern dress, and the
popularity o f the pocket flask as being important with certain groups,
as factors leading to petting. More important and fundamental,
however, is the fact that girls are not being divided so distinctly into
the good and the bad, and boys are not putting their sweethearts on
pedestals and thinking o f their Saturday-night friends as simply
instruments for gratifying their passions. There has grown a more
healthy comradeship among young people of both sexes, an effort to
find in the one individual those varied satisfactions which it is but
human to desire. This need not mean that actual sex relationships
are more commonly practiced. Petting is perhaps being utilized
more and more as a sublimation.
The essential contribution that a parent has to make to this par
ticular adolescent situation is that petting is very definitely a sex
experience; that naturally and normally, under happy marital rela
tionships, it precedes sexual intercourse, which in the unmarried state
is as dangerous in its social implications as it ever was, in loss o f social
approbation, mental conflict, venereal disease, and pregnancy.
Sex as one o f the important factors o f human development should
be regarded and discussed by parents as they would approach health.
The girl who overeats, who allows herself to get constipated, who
fails to look after her skin, and who fails to follow other hygienic
regulations gets fat and develops a poor complexion, never feels
right, and is likely to become physically unattractive and socially
handicapped. The girl who permits promiscuous petting with un
limited privileges gets the reputation of being “ easy ” and “ com
mon.” As a social asset, she is less valuable and soon finds that she
is left out o f much that would contribute to her happiness. This

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It f

may be a rather low level of adjustment from a purely moral point of
view, but young people can and do understand when we talk to them
about what type o f conduct will actually work out to their advan
tage. There is no danger in telling these young people that we
understand all the urges that quite naturally prompt them to seek
the thrills o f life in this particular way, yet at the same time show
them by the innumerable examples which are always available that
it actually pays to postpone these indulgences and help them find
other emotional outlets.
It is well to keep before these young people that the various ac
tivities which are generally covered by the term petting all too fre
quently fail to give the parties involved the satisfactions they are
after. Frequently these experiences are difficult to digest. T o many
they are esthetically repulsive, morally indigestible, and emotionally
unsatisfying. Even so, they may become habits after an appetite has
been created for this particular type of emotional stimulation. The
early indulgences are often brought about by the desire to test out
life, to try a new experience, to indulge in some new thrill. But after
that they are often carried on merely as a means to an end. That
end may be a desire for popularity, attention, and the participation
in social activity which they feel would otherwise be denied them.
These are all factors which should be discussed frankly with the
adolescent, and, again, the discussion may well be carried on as a
subject o f interest and practical importance, rather than as a per
sonal problem. It should be kept in mind that this problem of sex is
but one aspect o f life for the adolescent and that many pitfalls and
conflicts may arise in his effort to solve this one particular problem.
The adolescent will make his own adjustment to life adequately only
when he does it without being harmful to others. The adult who is
in a position to gain the confidence and respect o f the adolescent
Holds the strategic position. This can come about only when the
adolescent is sure that he is dealing with someone who has a clear
idea what the boy’s problems really are and a practical plan or phi
losophy o f life that will meet the boy’s daily needs. The adult who
deals with adolescents successfully will have an appreciation and
understanding o f adolescent problems in general as they exist today
and also he should know well each individual whose conduct he is
trying to affect.

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THE NEEDS OF THE PARENT
O lf ■

Parents must understand not only the real needs of the child but their own
needs and be able to satisfy them in a more wholesome manner than at the
child’s expense. (Pearson, Gerald H . J., M .D .: W hat the Adolescent Girl
Needs in Her Home. Mental Hygiene, vol. 14, no. 1 (January 1930), pp. 40-53.)

*
A

Much that has had to do with the relationship between parent
and child, particularly that aspect of these relationships which
has worked out to the disadvantage o f both child and parent, has
been stressed in the previous sections. One cannot understand
childhood behavior without carefully investigating the effects that
other people in the environment have upon the child, and o f course
the people who influence the conduct of children the most are the
parents. In spite of an effort to avoid being unduly critical and
assuming the attitude of the reformer toward the parents, it has
been necessary to discuss frankly the common blunders which as
parents we often make quite unconsciously. Those more sensitive
individuals who read this bulletin may be left with the idea that
there are but a limited number of children who succeed in emerging
from the adolescent period enjoying good mental health and that this
success has been accomplished in spite of parents, rather than because
them. It is not the intention of the author to leave this impression.
Let us therefore turn to some of the more constructive aspects
o f the parent-child relationship. This relationship has changed so
markedly during the past 2 decades that it is not surprising that
parents find themselves a bit confused as to just what their obliga
tions and responsibilities toward their children are in this modern
world. Moreover, many children would consider it but a relic of
the past if their obligations to their parents were brought up for
consideration. For generations in practically all countries, civilized
and uncivilized, children have been bidden to respect, honof, and
obey parents. In the laws o f the ancients there were no exceptions
and no extenuating circumstances for any lack o f respect on the
part of children toward their parents. Time itself has introduced
social factors which necessarily must affect the child’s attitude
toward his parents. A s civilization has advanced and the interests
o f man have extended beyond hunting, fishing, fighting, and the
interests o f woman beyond childbearing and housekeeping, and as
various trades and professions and occupations have developed,
children have had increased opportunity for becoming intimately as
sociated with a varied group of people. Under these conditions parents
obviously become less dominant factors in the lives of their children.
The foregoing is simply mentioned in order that parents may
grasp the idea that their children are less dependent upon them than
87

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they were upon their parents. One must understand and appreciate
how efficiently and with how limited an amount of turmoil and con
fusion young people have taken this recent step toward developing
their own independence. What this sudden transition in the attitude
o f adolescents toward their elders actually means is that if parents
are going to continue to stand out in the social scheme o f things
as being the dominant influence in the lives o f their children, this
influence must take root at any early age and not be postponed
simply to suit the convenience o f the parents until the child is fairly
well advanced toward adolescence. The idea which was so firmly
fixed in the minds o f children a few generations ago that all parents
were endowed with wisdom, that they were all worthy o f respect,
that their achievements entitled them to admiration, and that their
understanding o f human nature was unfailing, no longer exists.
This does not mean that children no longer love, respect, and admire
their parents, but it does mean that children view their parents more
critically; and if the latter are weighed and found wanting, they
are not endowed, merely because they are parents, with virtues which
they do not possess.
There is, on the other hand, a large group of parents who do not
wish for obedience and respect from their adolescents; on the con
trary, they wish to be the companions and friends o f their adolescent
sons and daughters, desiring only to be close to them and intimate
with them. But they, too, are destined to disappointment, for, as
has been pointed out, young people seek intimacy and companion
ship with those o f their own age. The errors into which such parents
are led may be seen in the following case:

Isabel's mother had married shortly after graduating from high school and
was still in her early thirties when her daughter began to show signs of growing
up. She had two younger children, but as they were both boys she had cen
tered all her hopes in Isabel so far as companionship for herself w as concerned.
In spite of her many duties as mother and homemaker, she had found time
to keep up a good game o f golf. She also played bridge several times a week,
read the latest novels, and attended the outstanding movies. She was inter
ested in fashions, enjoyed shopping, and was always smartly dressed. In
short, she was one of those modern mothers who seem not only to keep up
with the coming generation but at times to get ahead of it, and she was con
fident that she and her daughter would soon be able to play together more

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Isabel responded quietly and almost sulkily.

♦

as sisters than as mother and daughter.
One o f her first disappointments came over a new dress which Isabel needed
for a class dinner. She had talked it all over chummily with her daughter
for several days. She decided enthusiastically that the color would be blue,
and with the same enthusiasm she went down town, bringing back the blue
dress of her choice. She tried to pass on some of her eager excitement to Isabel
as she tried the dress on her, asking whether it wasn’t fun to be going to
a class dinner, and didn’t the dress look grown up, and so on, to all of which

TH E NEEDS OF TH E PARENT

The following day Isabel returned home from school very late and calmly
explained that she had purchased a dress for the class dinner. It was a less
expensive dress than the one her mother had bought and certainly less dis
tinctive. But she had selected it herself with the assistance of one of her own
friends, and she declared that this was the dress she would wear and no other.
W hen the night of the dinner came, Isabel dressed in her room without call
ing her mother in for assistance or for approval, and slipping her coat over her
dress, she ran downstairs and out of the house without letting her mother catch
as much as a glimpse of her. The latter was hurt and puzzled; yet as the even
ing wore on, her spirits rose and she began to look forward to Isabel’s return
when they would talk it all over. When Isabel finally came up the stairs she
called out eagerly, “ Hello, dear. Did you have a good time? Come in and tell
Mummy all about it.” To which Isabel replied, “ Oh, are you still up? I ’m too
tired to talk any more tonight. I ’m going right to bed. Good night.”
Isabel became increasingly secretive, and yet, so far as anyone knew, she never
did anything which she had any reason to hide from her family. B ut she
resented her mother’s great eagerness to share all her experiences and to discuss
frankly her most intimate thoughts and feelings. Perhaps she suspected that
her mother would boast to her friends of her intimate relationship with her
daughter and would repeat everything her daughter told h e r ; perhaps she felt
that she did not intrude upon her mother’s privacy and wished her mother not to
intrude on h ers; or perhaps she wished to shield her own newly developing per
sonality from the mature and dominating personality o f her mother. A t all events,
she withdrew more and more into herself in every way. I f her mother came into
her room when she was dressing, she fled to the clothes closet ; if her mother was
around in the evening when she was studying she locked the door of her room ;
before leaving the house in the morning she locked her desk lest her mother touch
any of the things; she would tell her parents where she was going, and she
would supply whatever details her father requested, but she would never dis
cuss her activities with them or describe what had happened or who was there.
This went on month after month. Isabel’s mother still made efforts to get
close to her. She would still come into her bedroom occasionally and sit in a
corner hoping to watch Isabel dress and be able to talk things over. Sometimes
she made such remarks as th is: “ Isabel, you seem to forget that I am your
mother. You hide yourself so persistently that I don’t believe I know what
you look like without your clothes on, and I ’m your own m other! ”
She was similarly grieved over the fact that Isabel never mentioned to her
anything even remotely related to the subject of sex. Isabel listened with
an indifferent expression when her mother tried to explain the process of
menstruation to her, and promptly talked about something else; in fact, this
was a subject which she consistently avoided with her mother, remaining
silent concerning herself and ignoring any remarks made by her mother.
Isabel’s devotion to her carefully locked diary added further to her mother’s
anguish. W h y couldn’t her daughter confide in her? W h at had she ever
done to Isabel to bring this upon herself? She felt that she was a failure and
could not understand why.

This case has been given in considerable detail because it includes
so many o f the typical sources o f difficulty and misunderstanding
arising between parent and adolescent. Parents frequently become
much distressed over the strange behavior o f sons and daughters
who seem abnormally modest in dressing in the presence o f their
parents; who never report on various phases o f their physiological

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development; who seem embarrassed, indifferent, or annoyed when
parents discuss sex with them; who keep private diaries; who never
have anything to relate after attending a party or being out for
an evening. Such parents are unaware first o f all o f the gulf that
exists between any two generations merely because o f the difference
in age regardless o f how modern the point o f view or how youthful
the manners o f the individual mother. Teachers and recreation
leaders make this same mistake when they try to bridge this gulf
with some such statement as “ Let’s all be boys together ” or “ W e’re
just a bunch of girls talking things over frankly.” It is far wiser
to be a parent— or a teacher or a recreation leader or other adult—
in manner and attitude as well as in actuality, and to say whatever
one has to say frankly, sincerely, and with dignity, and then to let
young people be young.
Although we may remember how we looked when we were 15, our
present 15-year olds see us only as the aging adults we are, no
longer lithe and sparkling, but increasingly stolid, wrinkled, heavy,
and growing gray or bald. The very idea o f our being on the same
level with them and sharing experience as equals is preposterous
and even absurd to them. We may try to use adolescent colloqui
alisms and hope to establish a relationship of intimacy and mutual
confidence by talking o f social, emotional, or physiological experi
ences in the popular terms o f our own day without realizing that
popular vocabularies change with the fashions and that in such at
tempts to reach the adolescent level we meet with as little success
as we would by dressing in the clothes o f our youth. It is useless,
for example, to talk to the adolescent about the undesirability of
spooning; for the adolescent of today does not spoon. Although
yesterday’s spooning may be today’s necking, our very word stamps
us as belonging to another generation. The adolescent at once con
cludes that we speak another language and have no understanding
o f his problems.
Our attitudes date us quite as definitely as our vocabularies. One
generation contemplates the phenomenon of birth with an attitude of
romantic sentimentality, while another considers it but an incident;
one generation approaches the female sex with an attitude of awe
and adoration, while in another generation women themselves claim
the right to be regarded as equals; one generation considers sex
relations a profane mystery, while another endows them with
spiritual significance, and another dismisses them as one of the
natural and normal animal phases of life. There are always some
individuals who are in advance of their generation and some who are
behind and some who must be at war with existing conditions what
ever they are. But each generation has its trends, and each newgeneration feels the urge to depart from these trends.

THE

♦

¥ *

0*\

NEEDS

THE

PARENT

There is a second obstacle to the relationship o f intimate equality
which such parents as Isabel’s mother desire with their children, and
tbat *s tbe fundamental difference in personality that may exist be
tween parents and their children despite all ties o f blood. Isabel’s
mother had made every effort to overcome all differences that might
be attributed to her greater age and to the fact that she had be
longed to another generation; she dressed, acted, played, and thought
according to Isabel’s own generation. But she had not overcome the
personality differences between herself and Isabel. In fact she did
not even recognize them, for she was constantly expressing surprise
over the fact that her own daughter should not be just like her .in
a11 her ways and thoughts. But daughters take after their fathers
as well as after their mothers, and sometimes they resemble distant
relatives on either side. It is unreasonable for parents to expect to be
able to identify themselves with them or relive their lives through them.
And this touches upon the third obstacle to an intimate identifica
tion between the parent and his adolescent child—namely, the adol
escent’s need to live his own' life. Isabel wanted to lead her own
life, even if it meant no more than choosing her own clothes and
thinking some o f her own thoughts. It would have been quite pos
sible for her mother to be sympathetically interested in her plans and
even to exert considerable influence on her behavior without trying
to force herself into the girl’s physical, intellectual, and emotional
privacy or drown her daughter’s reactions with her own enthusiasm
and excitement. She would undoubtedly have remained closer to
her daughter if she had been less aggressive in her approach to her.
The most important contribution which the parent can make to
the child is that o f preparing him to assume the obligations and
responsibilities which are associated with independence. I f it be
true that children are, as a group, throwing off the parental shackles
at an earlier date than they have done heretofore, it means that
parents must see that they are adequately equipped with habits and
personality traits and mental attitudes toward life that will work
out to their advantage. The problem o f the child’s dependence upon
the parent may be very successfully associated a little later with the
parent’s emotional dependence upon the child. There are those
parents who have built their lives so intimately around their chil
dren that they become extremely unhappy when they appreciate
that the parent no longer serves the same purpose to the adolescent
as he did to the younger child. It cannot be denied that this atti
tude o f the parent toward the child is fundamentally selfish and not
infrequently results unhappily for all concerned, especially if the
child has not quite grown up himself.
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G U ID IN G

THE

ADOLESCENT

A good example ^of parental dependence upon children may be seen in Mrs. D,
a mother who was so emotionally bound up in her 22-year-old son that she
could not bear the thought of his going away on a vacation with his wife whom
he had married within the year. Mrs. D deliberately planned and schemed
that she might have her son at her summer home in the mountains, at the
same time intimating that this would probably not be so healthful a place
for his wife as the seashore would be.

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Many a parent with this selfish, demanding, emotional attitude
toward his children has built up barriers which have prevented a
happy parental relationship in later years. Many an oversolicitous,
selfish mother has wrecked the marital happiness o f her son, and
many a father has rendered himself miserable and unhappy and has
developed feelings of being misunderstood and neglected, simply
because their children did not retain in adolescent life the immature,
dependent, emotional attitude which had meant so much to these
solicitous parents in the years gone by. So it is well to point out
that parents must prepare themselves to deal wisely with that phase
of life when their children are no longer to be dependent upon them.
Mothers are very much more likely to be affected by this situation
than fathers because in the natural course o f events men still con
tinue to be preoccupied with the task of providing for the family.
Their time is spent at the office, shop, or factory, and they come in
contact with many people and many problems. The mother’s big
job, however, has been that o f rearing the children; and unless she
has provided herself with some other interests, she will feel the
vacuum created when they are no longer demanding all her time.
Much has been said about the parents’ responsibility toward the
child, and during early years it is the parent who must supply the
initiative, judgment, and patience which this task entails. But it
must be kept in mind that as the child advances in. years he, too,
will have more and more to contribute toward the happiness and
satisfaction o f family life. Essentially the relationship between
parent and child should be maintained by a mutual effort to acquire
a better understanding of each other’s personality, each other’s
interests, problems, and pleasures—both parent and child endeavor
ing on the one hand to appreciate the various factors contributing
to their respective health, efficiency, and happiness, and, on the other
hand, to gain a clearer conception of the influences leading to dis
satisfaction, failure, and defeat.
Children will become interested in parents and the family as a
group only if they are permitted to take an active part in the family
activities at the earliest possible age. Children should be given an
intelligent insight into what goes to make up the life of the parents.
The child should know something about his father’s work, his
mother’s responsibilities in running the house, the social and eco
nomic status of his particular family as compared with that of other

THE

NEEDS

THE

PARENT

families. Thus he will have an intelligent appreciation of just what
he is entitled to in the way o f pleasures and amusements, clothes,
spending money, and so forth. Children at the adolescent age un
doubtedly would dispense money with more judgment and put a
higher value on the real things of life if they were better informed
as to the amount of effort their parents have to make to supply their
needs. Children cannot be expected to grasp the significance of the
necessity o f budgeting one’s time and money at first; but it is only
reasonable to expect that if knowledge is intelligently handed out
on these subjects, it will soon meet with something that is very much
worth while to both parent and child. (This aspect o f the parentchild relationship has already been touched upon in the sections on
work and leisure.)
But it must be repeated that this mutual interest in the affairs of
parents and child must start at an early age, so that when the child
reaches adolescence he will not be confronted suddenly with respon
sibilities that he will very likely resent. It is desirable to develop
in him that attitude which will just naturally make him reach out
and do his part o f the job, for unless it is done in this spirit and not
forced upon him, there is great danger that it will not be done at all.
But all these attitudes, habits, and personality traits must be re
garded as only the tools with which the individual makes a place
for himself in the social scheme o f things—implements which he
utilizes in the process of creating relationships that will be satis
factory and happy not only for himself but also for all those with
whom he comes in contact. In the process o f development he must
ever be ready to discard those tools which, although perhaps useful
in one period of life, have become inadequate for the present need.
Fortunately, we are well endowed with a plasticity which enables us
to modify our ideas and conduct, whether as adolescents discarding
infantile behavior patterns or as parents discarding adolescent
behavior patterns.
There' is no time when life presents so many doubts and inde
cisions as during the adolescent years. To many young persons life
becomes a very perplexing problem as their earlier hopes and as
pirations turn out to be daydreams and illusions, and there is a
tendency for them to be overwhelmed with the futility o f effort.
The child who has had the advantage o f living in a home with a
religious background—that type of religion which is practiced as
well as preached and which teaches the individual to think in terms
o f others than himself—finds that something very fundamental and
important has been woven into the moral fabric o f his personality.
Religion helps to give to the boy or girl that sense of security
and worthwhileness about life both present and future that the
maturing individual needs.

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B IBLIO G R APH Y
A ddam s, Jane: The Spirit of Youth and the City Streets. Macmillan Co.,
New York, 1909. 162 pp.
A v e r ill, Lawrence A u g u stu s: The Hygiene of Instruction; a study of the
mental health of the child. Houghton Mifflin Co., Boston, 1928. 386 pp.
B igelow , M aurice A . : Adolescence ; educational and hygienic problems.
(Edited by the National Health Council.) Funk & Wagnalls, 1927. 60 pp.
Brooks, Fowler D. : The Psychology of Adolescence. Houghton Miffin Co.,
Boston, 1929. 652 pp.
Burnham , W illia m H . : The Normal Mind. D. Appleton & Oo., New York, 1924.
702 pp.
Dennett, M a ry W a r e : The Sex Education o f Children ; a book for parents.
Vanguard Press, New York, 1931. 195 pp.
De Schweinitz, K a rl: Growing Up. Macmillan Co., New York, 1928. I l l pp.
E lliott, Grace Loucks: Understanding the Adolescent Girl. Henry H olt & Co.,
New York, 1930. 134 pp.
H artw ell, Samuel W ., M .D .: Fifty-five “ B a d ” Boys. Alfred A. Knopf, New
York, 1931. 359 pp.
H ollin gw orth , Leta S. : The Psychology of the Adolescent. D. Appleton & Co.,
New York, 1928. 259 pp.
M enninger. K a rl A . : The Human Mind. Alfred A. Knopf, New York, 1930.
447 pp.
Richards, Esther Loring, M .D . : Behaviour Aspects of Child Conduct. Mac
millan Co., 1932. 299 pp.
Rose, M ary Sw artz: Feeding the Family. Macmillan Co., New York, 1929.
459 pp.
V a n W a te rs, M ir ia m : Youth in Conflict. Republic Publishing Co., New York,
1925. 293 pp.
W ickes, Frances G .: The Inner World of Childhood; a study in analytical
psychology. D. Appleton & Co., New York, 1927. 379 pp.
W illia m s, Frank wood E., M .D . : Adolescence; studies in mental hygiene.
Farrar & Rinehart, 1930. 279 pp.
94

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Full text of Guiding the Adolescent, Bureau Publication No. 225

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